


Family isn’t always blood. NYSM

by Lou_La



Series: Now You See Me. (Whump Dump/Lovey Dovey) [1]
Category: Now You See Me (Movies)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Crying, Daniel Atlas has OCD, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Foul Language, HERE ARE THE FIRST 10 TAGS, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Multi, OCD, Sad, Sick Daniel, Swearing, TAGS WILL BE ADDED AS THE CHAPTERS PROGRESS!, Whump, sad daniel atlas
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-20
Updated: 2020-09-22
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:34:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 12
Words: 24,823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25961413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lou_La/pseuds/Lou_La
Summary: This is purely a fic dedicated to the one and only J.Daniel Atlas. This is a collection of one shots and small stories in where poor ol Danny-Boy gets ran through the meat grinder.(Whump, in other words)
Relationships: J. Daniel Atlas/Henley Reeves, J. Daniel Atlas/Merritt McKinney/Henley Reeves/Jack Wilder
Series: Now You See Me. (Whump Dump/Lovey Dovey) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1884307
Comments: 4
Kudos: 36





	1. Contents.

** I’ll probably do 30 chapters, or more… I can’t decide yet. It’ll defo be at least 30 tho. **

** I will take requests! **

**TAGS WILL BE ADDED AS THE CHAPTERS PROGRESS!**

Underlined = Not written yet.

**Bold = Has been done.**

_Italics = requests._

* * *

**1) Henley’s departure. (Whump! Heavy feels! Crying!)**

**2) Bullied for his OCD. (Crying! OCD! Panic attacks! Hugs!)**

**3) Stomach bug. (Vomiting! Headaches! Cramps! Crying! Alone! Abandonment!**

4) Gun shot wound. (Blood! Pain! Freaking out! Passing out! Near death!)

5) Broken leg. (Broken bone! Pain! Freaking out! Passing out!)

6) Stab wound. (Blood! Pain! Freaking out! Passing out! Near death!)

7) Panic attacks. (Anxiety! Panic attacks!)

8) Shitty childhood. (Suicide attempt! Siblings! Neglect!)

9) Truth or Dare. (The Horsemen find out the truth! Anxiety attacks! Bitterness!)

10) Ultimate betrayal. (Diners! Parents! Parental issues!)

11) Autism. (Social anxiety! Panic in public! Crying! Yelling! Arguments!)

12) Anxiety attack in public. (Anxiety! Panic! Attacks!)

13) Freaks out before going on stage. (Anxiety!)

14) Kidnapped. 1/3 (Torture! Blood! Swearing! Danny in pain! Hurt/no comfort!)

15) Kidnapped. 2/3 (Torture! Blood! Swearing! Danny in pain! Hurt/no comfort!)

16) Kidnapped. 3/3 (Torture! Blood! Swearing! Danny in pain! Hurt/no comfort!)

17) Never have I ever. (Hypnosis! Past abuse! Hitting! Verbal abuse!)

18) Drunken night. (Anxiety! Past abuse!)

19) Phone call from daddy dear. (Anxiety! Past abuse!)

20) Stalked. (Fear! Worry!)

21) OCD backstory. (No control! OCD! Triple A parents!)

22) Being searched. (Anxiety! Past abuse!)

23) Girlfriend from before the horseman. (Love! Miscarriage! Arguments!)

24) Discuses his family. (Whump! Feels! Anxiety! Abuse! Neglect!)

25) Migraine. (Headache! Crying! Dizziness! Vomiting!)

26) Food poisoning. (Vomiting! Cramps! Sleepy!)

27) Chest infection. (Pneumonia! Illness)

28) Scars on wrists. (Suicide attempt! Cutting!)

29) Trigger word. (Panic attacks! Anxiety! Flinching!)

30) Concussion. (Headache! Crying! Dizziness!)

31) Sleepy. (Tired! Snoozing! Cuddles! Fluff!)

32) Cancer. 1/4. (Cancer! Lung Cancer! Chemo Therapy! Illness! Crying! Death!)

33) Cancer. 2/4. (Cancer! Lung Cancer! Chemo Therapy! Illness! Crying! Death!)

34) Cancer. 3/4. (Cancer! Lung Cancer! Chemo Therapy! Illness! Crying! Death!)

35) Cancer. 4/4. (Cancer! Lung Cancer! Chemo Therapy! Illness! Crying! Death!)


	2. Henley’s Departure.

TAGS INCLUDED/ADDED: (Whump! Crying!)

* * *

Merritt Mckinney could tell that his fellow Horsemen were getting antsy. They’d heard nothing from the Eye in over a year, prompting them to possibly believe that the Eye no longer needed them, or wanted them. It didn’t take a Mentalist to work any of that out. Jack was more than happy to brush up on his card skills and mentor Merritt in the process while they waited. Atlas was secluding himself in his room more and more, and Henley was steadily getting angrier. 

The only one who didn’t seem bothered was Jack. 

The FBI had eased off of them a little in the last few months. A new Drug lord was in New York, meaning they were working on him now. 

* * *

It was a rainy day when Merritt heard the news. Jack was, once again, practising his card tricks in the small kitchen they shared in the apartment just about big enough for the 4 of them. Daniel was in his room reading stuff Merritt didn’t bother finding out (it was probably the dictionary or something like that) and Henley was sat next to him on the sofa, watching the tv. Merritt was reading an old book that his old man had given him years ago, something about ancient mythology. Henley let out a large sigh, followed by: “I’m leaving, Merritt.” 

Merritt’s thoughts took 5 seconds too long to screech to a halt. “What?” He asked, not sure if he heard her right. “I’m sick of waiting and hiding, I want to live my own life. I’m leaving the Eye,” Merritt let out a puff of air and scooted further up the sofa. “Hen, we’re all sick of waiting and hiding. You don’t see any of us quitting,” he gently spoke to her. Henley turned and looked at him with pleading eyes. “All my life, something or someone has held me down. First, my peers, then my parents, then my boyfriend, and just as my career was about to take off, the Eye held me down again. It’s not fair, Merritt.” Merritt sighed, “Well, ultimately, I can’t stop you. If you want to go, do it. Good luck telling the Eye,” He went to try back to his book when Henley spoke again, “I already have.” Merritt whipped his head around, “You got into contact with the Eye?” He asked, incredulous. Henley nodded and looked down into her lap. “They’ve given me an out. New name, new location. I’m no longer apart of the Horsemen once I leave.” Merritt slowly nodded and exhaled deeply. “Well, good luck kid. Thats all I can say,” 

* * *

3 days later, Henley left. No goodbye, no nothing. Just a note addressed to each of them, individually. Typed up and printed so they could’t trace her if they so chose to. The first person to discover the note was Merritt. Jack was buying groceries and Daniel was out visiting his sick mother in Chicago. Merritt picked up his note and tore open the envelope and began to read it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_Dear Merritt._

_Words cannot express how grateful I am for you. You have helped me in ways I never knew you could. You have helped me see that I am not just a puppet for people to manipulate around and bully into doing what they want. Because of you, I feel more confident in the tasks I do now, and I thank you. Look after Jack and Danny for me? Jack may seem like he’s ready to be an adult, but he grew up too quickly. He needs to still be a kid sometimes. And Danny? He never knows when to stop. Hell, he’ll keep going even if he’s bleeding out on the ground. Make sure he gets enough food, water and rest, would you?_

_I hope you and the others become the most famous group of magicians known to man, even up there with Houdini. I hope you have a good life, Merritt.  
_

_Goodbye. Henley. xxx_

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Merritt wasn't aware of any tears falling down his face until they hit his note. He quickly swiped them away, for fear of ruining one of his best friends last things for him. Merritt sniffed loudly and grabbed a glass and a bottle of whiskey.

Alcohol cleanse, be fucked. He needed it today.

* * *

When Jack walked in from getting the groceries, he wasn’t expecting the strong stench of whiskey to hit his senses. “Jesus Christ, Merritt. Did you drink enough?” He called as he walked through the small kitchenette. He dumped the bags on the counter top and saw two envelopes. One said “To Jack,” and the other was addressed to Daniel. Jack picked up his letter and Daniels. He opened Daniel’s bedroom door and threw the letter on the bed. He shut the door and made his way back to the living room. He pushed Merritt’s feet off of the sofa, much to the elder man’s displeasure, and sat down. Jack tore the envelope open and began to read the letter.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_Dear Jack._

_I’m sorry I’m too much of a coward to face to and tell you face-to-face. I guess I just didn’t want to see how sad you’d get if I did. Don’t let people push you around, and don’t forget that you’re only 21, you still have time to be a kid. I wasted my teenage years running and hiding from people who wanted to use me. Don’t force yourself to grow up because you feel like you have to. Merritt has already lived through his teens and 20’s, let him be the grown up. Don’t work yourself too hard either, that’s Danny’s job. Please don’t think I’m leaving because I wanted to. I didn’t._

_I hope you have a good life, Jack. I hope you find someone to make you happier than you’ve ever been. Please don’t try to find me, if you need me, you will know where I am without even thinking it._

_Love, Henley. xxx_

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jack felt numb. His best friend just left? Without saying anything? At some point in the last few minutes, Merritt had woken up. He placed a firm hand on Jack's shoulder. “I know, kid. Sometimes, family leaves. All you can do is be happy that they’re off doing what they want to do.” Jack just nodded, not hearing anything except a mumble. His ears were ringing with the sudden realisation that Henley wasn’t coming back. Jack clenched his jaw and threw the letter on the ground. He stomped off to the kitchenette, where he finished putting the groceries away. 

* * *

Merritt was dreading Daniel’s reaction to Henley’s departure. Sure, they were close, but Merritt knew Daniel and Henley were closer than he and Jack were to her. So when the door slammed open and Daniel stormed in, throwing his coat on the bar stool chair 2 days earlier than he was due to come back, Merritt knew the tantrum that was going to ensue was going to be one to behold. Daniel’s bedroom door slammed shut hard enough to make the lamp in the hall shake a little bit. Whatever had happened in Chicago was definately bad. Sure, Atlas had small, frequent tantrums, but he scarcely had large ones. When he did, 90% of the time, they weren’t unjustified. Merritt picked himself up out of his hangover cocoon and gently picked up Daniel’s coat. He hung it up on the wall and began to make himself a drink. Non-alcoholic, this time. When no noises surfaced from Daniel’s room after 30 minutes, Merritt decided to go in and check on him. Make sure he wasn’t doing anything stupid. 

“Daniel?” He asked, gently knocking on the door. He waited for 10 seconds, then opened it. Daniel was passed out on his bed, shoes still on, envelope still unopened. Merritt moved the letter to his bedside table along with his glasses (which had haphazardly fallen on the bed) and his watch. He undid his shoes and threw a blanket over the top, not bothering to tuck him in like a child. Merritt drew the curtains closed and left without doing anything else. 

* * *

It was around 1 the next day when Daniel surfaced from his room. Jack and Merritt were eating a late lunch at the small breakfast bar, not saying anything. Jack was still clearly hurt and pissed about the letter, which was understandable. From what Merritt had gathered, Henley hadn’t spoken to anyone about her leaving except from Merritt and the Eye. Merritt was pulled out of his thoughts when Daniel walked into the kitchenette with the letter in his hand. His hair was disheveled, and his shirt wasn’t tucked in. He had a t-shirt carelessly thrown on and some loose fitting jogging bottom type trousers on. Merritt noticed his hands were shaking slightly. _Here we go,_ he thought.

“Who’s brilliant idea was this?” Daniel asked, addressing the two at the bar. Jack glanced up at Merritt, looking confused, before going back to pushing his eggs around his plate. “What brilliant idea?” Jack mumbled. Daniel waved the letter around, the paper making a crinkling sound. “This letter about Henley leaving. Very funny, by the way.” Daniel dropped the letter on the counter, just in front of Merritt and walked over to the fridge. He poured himself some apple-juice and put some bread in the toaster. Daniel leant against the counter and drank his drink while he waited. “Daniel, we didn’t write this. We got one to,” Merritt calmly explained, puling out his own letter and putting down. “Jack’s is still in the room by the couch, I presume, unless he’s moved it.” Jack mumbled something, which Merritt presumed to be no. He then proceeded to dump the plate in the sink. “Not hungry anymore,” He said and walked to his room, where Merritt could hear the lock click shut. Just him and Daniel now. Merritt noticed that Daniel wasn’t looking at him anymore, but the floor. “Daniel?” He tried. Daniel didn’t move his gaze, but he did speak. “She’s really gone then?” Merritt couldn’t tell if Daniel was asking a question or not, so all he did was nod. “Yeah,” he whispered. Daniel didn’t move or speak. He was so still, Merritt was sure he froze completely. But then he slammed his glass down and stormed out of the room. The bang made from the glass made Merritt jump slightly. His door slammed shut even harder than the night before. The toaster popped, but Merritt ignored it. He picked up Daniel’s letter and read it for himself.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_Dear Danny._

_I can’t even begin to write where I’m thankful for you. Without you taking me on as your assistant, I never would have gotten my gigs. I never would have been able to pursue a solo career, you helped give me something to fight for. I stopped running and hiding because of you. Even if we fought more than twice a day, there is no-one on Earth I would rather have been my first boss. Not even Dylan. I want you to know, that I didn’t leave because of you. I left because I ~~wanted~~ needed to start a new life for myself. One day, I want to settle down and have children with a white picket fence. You don’t. You want to keep dong magic, and that’s fine. We never spoke about kids, but I could tell because of what happened to you, you weren’t ready yet, you needed to heal. I can’t wait until then, Danny. Who knows how long we’re talking? And this is after the whole Eye and FBI business.   
_

_I want you to focus on_ you _, for a change. Don’t work too hard, the acts you put on are flawless and perfect, everytime. I want you to start caring for yourself again. Don’t fall into the same abyss you did all those years ago._

_I hope you take care of yourself. Like I said to Merritt, make sure Jack doesn’t grow up too quickly and don’t work too hard._

_I hope you have a good life._

_Love you forever, Henley. xxx_

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Merritt put the letter down with a heavy sigh; Henley sure has made her mark on the others. He quietly walked to Daniel’s room to make sure he was ok. He paused and pressed his ear against the closed door. Merritt’s heart crumbled when the sound of heartbroken _sobbing_ hit his ears. Merritt grimaced but didn’t open the door. _He’ll check on him tomorrow._ He deserved time to recover.

Merritt opened up his messenger and sent a message to Daniel and Jack. They’d get it when they were ready to.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_Just remember, Henley’s departure hurt us all. If you ever need me, you know where I am._


	3. The others find out about his OCD.

TAGS INCLUDED/ADDED: (Crying! OCD! Panic attacks! Hugs!)

* * *

Daniel grew up from the age of 7 having no control over his life. His mum and dad were constantly arguing and on the very few days they weren’t, they were in a stony, unbearable silence. Daniel was one of 5 children, he was the youngest. The oldest was his brother, Mason. Then there was his oldest sister, Nicola. Then his twin brother and sister, Alex and Jennifer. Finally, there was Daniel. His real name wasn’t Daniel, though. No, his real name was James. But that was besides the point. He wasn’t planned, nor wanted. His siblings and parents made sure he knew this everyday.

* * *

Mason was 19 when Daniel was born, making him almost an entirely different generation. Daniel was born at a completely normal age for his parents, maybe they were a bit old, but that doesn’t matter. They were 35 when they had him. Daniel’s mum and dad were 16 and 17, respectively, when they had Mason. His dad's parents stopped having anything to do with him, whereas his mum’s parents had ferociously driven her into believing abortions were the worst sin of all. So, she went through with all 4 pregnancies. Mason became hooked onto drugs after his friend roofied his drink when they went clubbing when Mason was 15. 

There wasn’t the security then as there is now.

Mason drained the bank account for the family buying his drugs. His parents had to pick up 2 jobs each just to afford them all. They eventually sent Mason off to rehab when he was 17, and he is still in and out. Mason is now 40.

His oldest sister, Nicola, was 15 when Daniel was born. She is a successful lawyer now, having graduated from Harvard as valedictorian. Nicola is 36 and owns her own law firm. Nicola moved from New York to San Francisco where her firm is based. She hardly ever speaks to them anymore. Probably too busy being ashamed that 2 of her siblings are enemies of the law, one of which had the FBI on his ass.

Next, was Jenny with Alex following 5 minutes behind. They were only 7 when Daniel was born, so Daniel is relatively close with them. Closer to them than his is to Nicola and Mason. Jenny and Alex are 28. Alex is married and working in a stable job at one of Nicola’s firm, which is in New York, as manager of a department. Alex also has two children, neither of which Daniel has met, nor has he been invited to see them. Hell, he wasn’t even invited to the Christening. (He went anyway, he was in that area with the horsemen already, but that’s besides the point. It’s not like he watched from the windows, no way) Daniel doesn’t even know their names.

He sent a small package through the firm for them though. Only a cuddly toy each, a normal brown bear. One had a pink bow and the other had a blue bow-tie. 

Daniel checked his brothers Facebook under the alias name of Jason Fischer. He had a daughter who was 3 and a son who was 1.

Daniel frequently chatted with Jenny over Facebook and on face-time. Jenny once came out to see him when he was staying in Vegas with the other horsemen. She came the day before the show, stayed that night and left after the show. 

Jenny, as far as Daniel knew, was in medical school studying to be a midwife.

* * *

Daniel stopped speaking to his parents when he was 14, mere weeks before he ran away. Jenny was the one to hold 4 year old Daniel as he cried, asking where his mum and dad were. Jenny was only 11, and yet she was the most compassionate out of them all. Mason was in rehab (again) and Nicola was studying for her Harvard Law entry exams. She was accepted into Harvard while his mum was still pregnant and accepted into Harvard Law when she was 19. Alex was probably playing video games at his friends, just down the road.

When Mason permanently went into Rehab, and Nicola went into Harvard Law accommodation, and Alex was at his friends every night, Daniel would hang out with Jenny. She basically sacrificed her teenage years to mother him. 

But one day, it all went to shit. 

Daniel was turning 11. Mason and Nicola were already long out of the picture and Alex went on holiday with his friends. Jenny went on a University trip for the day, so it was down to Daniels parents to plan the party.

Daniel was very anti-social when he was younger. His parents had began to argue everyday when he turned 7. This lead to an even bigger rift in the household. His dad would yell and complain about having another mouth to feed and look after, while his mother tried to defend him, even though they all knew his dad was right. They would argue, his dad would throw things, his mum would curse at him and they’d storm off, leaving Daniel to watch free-tv.

His parents arguments progressively grew more and more aggressive, more curse words thrown, more vases broken and more cracks made. Daniel fell out with one of his school friends when he was 10 and called him a fat bastard. 

He got suspended for a week and his dad beat him for the first time.

* * *

His mother lost her shit when she found out that he’d been beaten while she was at work and threatened to slit his dad’s throat while he slept.

Every weekend when his mother had to work, his father would beat him if Jenny wasn’t around. She tried to be around as often as she could, but Daniel told her not to worry, that he was a big boy. Jenny had smiled sadly and cuddled him all night until their dad stumbled in from work, shithoused on booze. 

Jenny had scored a 100% unconditional scholarship to a prestigious medical university one day. Her siblings and parents heavily encouraged her to go, to live her dream out. She didn’t want to leave Daniel with their dad, but he insisted she go.

So, she left. Daniel didn’t see her again for over 5 years.

She went to Oxford University, in Oxford, United Kingdom. 

* * *

Daniel’s parents stayed together until the day his dad hit his mum. She broke his nose, grabbed Daniel’s hand and pulled him out of the house. They stayed at a hotel, which Nicola payed for. She was always more fond of her mother than her father.

His mother eventually ran out of money and had to go back to his dad. He said the beatings would stop. They did. For a while. Daniel was 14 when he was beaten to the point of 911 having to come out. His mother was passed out on the sofa, and his dad left an hour before hand. 

12 cracked ribs, 3 broken, concussion, bruising on the lung, broken knee and dislocated shoulder. They sent him back when his parents vehemently said he’d fallen down their stairs. His mother believed his dad, who was a lying scumbag.

* * *

Daniel ran away as soon as his painkillers ran out. His parents didn’t bother to find him. Daniel found himself in a small magic shop and began practising.

* * *

.~.

* * *

.~.

* * *

.~.

* * *

.~.

* * *

.~.

* * *

.~.

* * *

.~.

* * *

So yeah, that was his tragic backstory to his OCD. It might not seem like it has a bearing on it, but, it does. Having no control over how your parents act, how your siblings act? It fucked him up, big time.

He learned to have complete control over the little things. Like, how books were arranged, how the food was stocked, how many light switches they had, how many times he needed to pat down his body to make sure he had everything (6. It had to be 6. Not 4, not 5, not an odd number. 6)

He tried not to let the larger things bother him, but he couldn’t help it. Like, when Merritt’s hat was crooked slightly, or if Henley’s top button was undone, he would snap at them to sort it out. Henley would stick up her middle finger and undo even more just to piss him off, but Merritt would just stare at him until he left. 

Daniel’s room was chaotically organised. His books were in alphabetical order in order of thickness (so, if Apples are red is only 20 pages, but Adam and Eve is 500, Apples are read would go first, with Adam and Eve last. Then, it would be Butterfly effect with 570 pages first in the B section, and Burties red bus at the end with 15 pages and so forth)

The clothes he would wear the next day were hung on his small chair in order of how they would be put on. (Hoodie last, shirt, socks, jeans, pants. In that order with his shoes underneath) His bed would be made when he first got up, after he’d opened up his curtains first. Then he would take his pills (anxiety and anti-depressants) and stare at himself in the small mirror on the wall. Then, he would put on his dressing gown and do himself breakfast. This normally took place at 8 am, while the others were still asleep. He would sit by the window and eat his cereal (always Cocoa-Krispies with half a bowl of green-topped milk) and debate his life choices that lead him to here. Then he would put his bowl in the empty dishwasher (which he had done before breakfast) and have a quick shower. He would scrub his head with the shampoo 6 times and wash it thoroughly. Then, he would wash his body. He would turn the shower off and walk into his room, where he would then check on his siblings through his alias name of Jason Fischer while he air dried. Then, he would put his clothes on and walk out with a book to the front area where the others would begin to wake up. As normal, Henley would be the first out and would sarcastically ask why he was up at the crack of dawn. (It was 10 am)

Life was good this way. Organised, and on a schedule.

* * *

.~.

* * *

.~.

* * *

.~.

* * *

It was nearly a year after their first show. Daniel and the others were relaxing in the shared apartment for the first time in christ knows how long. As usual, Merritt’s hat was crooked, Henley had forgotten her top button and Jack was asleep in the love-seat. Daniel was in the kitchenette rifling through the draws of seemingly endless paperwork trying to find something. He didn’t know what he was looking for, but he needed something to keep his hands and mind busy.

It was Jenny’s birthday. They’d tragically fallen out a little over 4 weeks ago and she had yet to speak to him again. Daniel feared she may not ever again. He had said some nasty words. She’d said them back as well, so neither one of them was innocent, but they were both far too stubborn to apologise first. Daniel had joked that they should have been twins.

Daniel roughly took all of the paper out of the drawer and bumped it shut with his hip as he began to sort through the papers. He planned to sort through them so they could go in order of date. As far as he could tell, the earliest date was August 3rd, 2009 and the latest date was 2 weeks ago, July 8th 2011. Daniel began to sort through them all when Merritt cleared his throat.

“Not that I don’t appreciate you sorting through our papers, Danny-Boy, but is there a particular reason?” Daniel glanced up briefly before looking back down. “You’re all so unorganised and messy, someone needs to keep you tidy.” He proceeded to sort out papers ranging from September 2009 to November 2009.

“Danny, relax. We’ve just pulled off 3 really dangerous, but 3 really cool things. We deserve to rest,” Henley spoke up. “I don’t mind doing this. I wouldn’t do it if I didn’t want to, would I?” He snarked back. Henley rolled her eyes and changed the channel.

* * *

They found out about his OCD less than a month later. 

Sure, Daniel suspected they knew he had some form of OCD, but he never paid too much mind to it. He hadn’t heard from any of his siblings in the last 7 weeks. (Granted, the only one he’d heard of in the last year was Jenny, but even she wasn’t speaking to him)

Daniel had gone out to get some food when it happened. He’d pat himself down 6 times, jiggled the door handle when he left 6 times and made his way to the shops. He came back, surprised to see the door unlocked. Daniel presumed that the others were back, so he began to put the shopping away in alphabetical order of date expiration. It was when he turned around that he lost his shit.

All the papers he’d sorted out were sprawled across the countertop, the books were all over the place, the sofa cushions were on the floor and creased to hell, there was plates from last nights dinner out and the rug was bumped up. Daniel, for some unknown (and probably stupid reason) felt his heart begin to speed up. The complete disorganisation of the room made his head spin and he felt slightly nauseous. He walked to his room, hoping to clear his head up with his system, but found it even worse than the front room.

His bed sheets were creased and half pulled off the bed, the pillows were haphazardly thrown near the headboard, his books were put into different places in his bookshelves, his clothes on the floor, his clothes for the next day were somewhere on his floor, his drawers were all pulled out.

Daniel’s heart stopped. He felt his breath coming out shakily, and he pressed a hand to his chest. He dropped onto his bed, feeling lightheaded.

_He’s 11 again. Everything is out of control. Everything is everywhere, glass, broken plates, broken family frames, everything._

Daniel wasn’t aware of the tears running down his face, or his whimpers. 

* * *

Merritt was though. He’d come in through the front door and found the fridge wide open. He frowned as he walked down the hall to the bedrooms. There, he found Daniel’s door open a crack. He pushed it open and found the second youngest showman having a panic attack on his bed.

Merritt had experienced a few himself.

“Daniel, buddy, I need you to speak to me. What’s wrong? Focus on my voice.” Daniel’s eyes darted like a injured animals. “Ok, Daniel, I need you to tell me 5 things you can see. Go,"

“You, my shoes, the door, the walls, the mess,” His breathing picked up. Shit. Merritt promised himself that he’d never do it, but needs must. He pressed a fist to Daniel’s chest and pressed hard. “When I click my fingers, you will sleep. You will dream of a dreamless dream. You will not wake up for 12 hours. You will feel the overwhelming urge to close your eyes when they open. And, sleep,” Merritt clicked his fingers. Daniel went limp against his body. He pushed Daniel onto the bed and left, pretending that he didn’t just see the strongest horseman break down in front of him.

* * *

“Daniel, it’s ok. You don’t have to be ashamed about it! Everyone has a thing!” Henley had exclaimed when Daniel told them about his OCD… well, when he was forced to. They’d asked about his panic attack. What was he supposed to say? Anything would make him look weak! “Hell, I’m shit scared of germs, Merritt can’t stand snakes and Jack can’t say Ketchup without feeling sick.” Jack shuddered, “Even hearing it makes me feel weird.” Daniel still felt apprehensive about it, but ultimately, the secret was out now. 

And, actually, he was a little bit glad it was. 

The others began to help with more of his issues. Henley would make sure the books were in his order, Jack would keep on top of the dirty plates and Merritt would the papers. 

Maybe having OCD wasn’t as bad as he thought it was? The others never mentioned it to him, or questioned his methods again.


	4. Stomach bug.

TAGS INCLUDED/ADDED: (Vomiting! Headaches! Cramps! Crying! Alone! Fever!)

This isn’t as long as my other two! It’s probably about half as long.

* * *

When Merritt had gone to visit an old friend from New Jersey two weeks ago, none of the horsemen expected him to bring any form of an illness or virus back. Merritt, obviously, went down with it first. Two days later, Jack went down. Another day later, Henley became ill. Daniel did what any respecting human would do: 

He isolated himself away from them all. He would wear a face-mask neck shield things and disposable gloves when he deep-cleaned the apartment every night, while they slept. He wasn’t doing it for them, they should have been more careful. He would use a bleach-based spray for the work surfaces (it was meant for food preparation areas) and clean all the door handles with it. Daniel would then hoover all around the room and put any dirty tissues in the bin. Daniel then bleaches the toilet and scrubs the sink. He then pours (probably too much) bleach into the offending bins and leaves them overnight.

Then, he showers and goes to bed. By then, it’s around 1 in the morning. He can normally hear footsteps walking around near 9/10 am, but he just rolls over and goes back to bed. Daniel doesn’t actually leave his room for the whole day unless he needs to pee or go out for food.

* * *

So that’s why he is unpleasantly surprised when he catches the same stomach virus as the others about a week after Henley does. Daniel opts to stay in his room for the first 3 days as all he has is nausea and a bad headache. Merritt is the first one to recover. So, he took over the cleaning duties every night and he made sure that his friends were kept properly hydrated and fed.

Daniel soon moved his sick fort to the front room (Henley and Jack were still quite sick with it) and watches trashy tv with them. Jack is at the tail end of the virus, meaning all his has is a super bad headache and small fever. Henley and Daniel are camped on one sofa (the larger one) while Jack is lounging in the small armchair and Merritt is sleeping by the window, much like a cat. By the 4th day, Daniel had permanently moved himself to the bathroom. The others were more recovered than he was, but still ill.

* * *

Henley was nursing her headache in her bedroom when she heard the bathroom door shut and lock again. She needed to get some aspirin anyway, so she walked up and out of her room, fighting off a dizzy spell as she moved. Spotting Merritt and Jack in the front room, she knew that it was Daniel who was suffering in the bathroom again. It wasn’t a nice stomach virus, but at least it was only vomiting. Henley grabbed an aspirin, swallowed it with a gulp of water and pressed her fingers to her temples. “If it's any consolation, Heners, we both got a killer headache when ours was nearly finished.” Merritt said from somewhere in the front room. Henley didn’t say anything, but sighed deeply. She then proceeded to walk to the bathroom and gently knock on the door. “Danny? Are you still in there?” She asked, equally as gently. There was a small shuffling sound and the sound of the toilet flushing before the door clicked open. “Sorry, do you need to use it?” A raspy voice asked. Henley stopped herself from gasping at the sight of her on-and-off lover. The bags under his eyes were so dark, it looked like someone had punched him, repeatedly. He had a blanket wrapped around his shoulders, his hair was damp with sweat, and he was as pale as a sheet. Henley shook her head, “No, I just thought you could do with some company.” She spoke, quiet enough so the others couldn’t hear her, but loud enough so Danny could. “I’m good. I’ve not actually puked for the last hour, but I feel like I might. I’m sure you don’t wanna see that.” He made a move to push the door back, but Henley pushed it back open. Danny didn’t resist, and if that wasn’t an indication that Daniel was really sick, nothing was. “I’ll sit with you. You’ve helped me with my hangovers before. It’s no worse than this,” Daniel looked up at her through red eyes, “But your fear of germs?” Henley wiggled herself in and pushed the door shut. “I don’t mind. I can always shower again,” She clicked the lock shut and sat down on her knees. “C’mon, let’s at least make your sick cocoon worthy of sleeping in."

* * *

It’s not that Daniel didn’t appreciate Henley coming in to sit with him while he threw up meals from last week, but he didn’t like showing weakness. 

He’s the lead-horseman, he should be stronger than Atlas himself, and not be brought to his knees begging for death as he leans over the disgusting toilet to dry heave pointlessly for the 18th time that hour. Henley was there, playing with the hair at the back of his head and rubbing his back while he puked.

Daniel hadn’t actually eaten anything solid in the last 12 hours, but he had eaten soup. That was brought back up as quickly as it was digested. Henley tried to make him eat some crackers and take some aspirin, but his body rejected it quicker than normal. 

His stomach continued to churn and twist and bubble ominously while he tried to take a small nap, which Henley had suggested. “You really should try and sleep, Danny. You haven’t really slept much recently.” She whispered, trying not to aggravate his already pounding head.

Daniel’s eloquent response was a sickly belch which had him throwing up Mondays dinner. Everytime he puked, Henley would flinch slightly. Daniel pulled away from the toilet and rested against the sink cupboards with a groan. He used a paper towel to wipe his mouth. “Henney, you don’t need to stay here if you don’t want to. I know this is gross,” He would say. Henley would dampen the cloth in the cold water, put it on his neck and would sigh. “I don’t disagree with you, but you need the help. You don’t like Merritt enough to let him do this, and you don’t know Jack enough either. You barely let me do it, much less the others."

A sharp cramp would rip it’s way through his body and he would be left bending over at the waist, breathing heavily. “Danny?” Henley would ask, reaching her hand out to him. He’d wave her off. “It’s fine, I’m sure it’s just my muscles."

This is how it went for the next 3 days.

* * *

Daniel eventually stopped puking as much, but didn’t stop. Henley had left on the Tuesday, nearly a week after Daniel had fallen ill. Daniel moved from the bathroom to his bedroom, still with a bin in case he needed to be sick and couldn’t make it to the bathroom in time. He used the group’s iPad to watch his Netflix and message them if he needed anything. Jack had dropped in with his meds and some water every now and then, while Merritt dropped off some toast and crackers. Henley had come in during the nights and massaged his temples and the base of his neck to ward of the migraine brewing in the back of his head. This gave him a few hours of sleep every night, but ultimately, Daniel never expected her to stay up all night massaging him. When Daniel’s fever hit on the last 4 days of his sickness, it hit him hard.

* * *

Henley was in Danny’s room, again, massaging his temples to help him sleep more. He just about slept enough before he was ill, now he was barely sleeping at all. Henley could feel his temperature rising, so she went to dampen a cloth in the bathroom. As she got off of the bed, she heard a noise she never expected to hear from the Daniel Atlas: a whimper. His hand blindly reached out for her. “Don’t leave me alone as well,” he pleaded. Henley felt her heart clench. “I’m just going to get a damp cloth to help your head, I’m only in the bathroom.” She gently spoke. “Promise you’ll come back?” Daniel whimpered. “I promise,” Henley replied. She made sure she was extra quick getting the damp cloth.

Placing it on his neck and continuing with her massage, Henley began thinking. “Danny, why did you think I wouldn’t come back?” Daniel glanced up through fever-glazed eyes. “You’re gonna think it’s stupid,” he mumbled, looking away again. “No I won’t, I promise,” Henley quietly spoke. "My parent’s left, my siblings left, my friends left… even you left.” Henley’s thoughts screeched to a halt. “Wait, you thought I wouldn't come back from the bathroom… because I _quit_ as your _assistant_ over 3 years ago?” She couldn’t help the incredulous tone that her body produced. “See, I told you it was stupid.” Daniel sniffed and shifted slightly. “Just because I quit as your assistant, does not mean I quit as your friend, Danny. We’ve been though too much, and you’ve told me too much for me to just leave. I’m not going anywhere, anytime soon. I swear on my life,"


	5. Gun shot wound.

TAGS INCLUDED/ADDED: (Blood! Pain! Freaking out! Passing out!)

* * *

The realisation hit him long before the pain did. He was stood up on the wall, staring down at the Interpol Agent, Alma Dray. She’d yelled at him to freeze and held her gun up. “You’re not gonna shoot me, d’ya wanna know why? It’s cause you _need_ me,” Alma looked like she was considering it for a split second, but Daniel hesitated. In her consideration, Daniel could have jumped off the wall and ran away, just like it was planned. 

If he hadn’t goddam hesitated.

Alma glared up at him and clicked the safety off. “I have 3 other witnesses at my disposal, if I have to kill you. Don’t test my patience,” Daniel narrowed his eyes at the Agent, almost egging her on. “WHAT ARE YOU DOING? SHOOT HIM!” Agent Rhodes’ voice yelled from just behind Agent Dray. The sudden shout caused Daniel to flinch and Alma to pull the trigger. A loud bang echoed through the alley way and Daniel fell of the wall.

* * *

He knew he’d been shot, the loud bang in the alley way signified that, but he couldn’t feel any pain, so Daniel got up and ran off to the rendezvous point. Daniel pressed his back against the wall as a swarm of FBI agents ran past, not seeing him. A slight twinge in his shoulder made him roll it, thinking it was just stiff from his fall just 5 minutes earlier. A sharp pain ran through his left arm. Daniel pressed two fingers into his shoulder blade to try and stop it hurting. When he pulled his fingers away though, they were covered in blood. Daniel untied his hoodie from his waist and shrugged it on, the movement causing a slight pain to run through his arm.

The FBI agents had long gone, so Daniel continued running. He skidded round the corner and found the other horsemen waiting anxiously. “Daniel! Where the fuck were you!?” Danny took a moment to catch his breath. “I had to deal with that Interpol agent! She wouldn’t let me leave!” Merritt snorted, “The great J. Daniel Atlas was held up by a _rookie agent_?!” Daniel glared, “Laugh it up, laugh it up,” He rolled his eyes.

* * *

They managed to get into the car that lead them to a safe house without attracting the FBI’s unwanted attention. Daniel was behind the passenger seat next to the window, Henley was next to him in the middle, Jack was next to her behind the driver and Merritt was in the passenger seat. Daniel’s shoulder had began to hurt a lot more now the adrenaline was wearing off. He winced as he pressed his burning(?) head onto the cold window. “-iel?” Daniel frowned and opened his eyes (when had he closed them?) and blearily looked at Henley, who was apparently talking to him. “What?” He spoke. Daniel’s vision flickered, and for a second, he thought he’d pass out. Luckily, he didn’t. “ _I said_ ‘what are we doing now?’ our orders just say finish it off at 5 Pointz.” Daniel sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose with his uninjured arm. (His right)

“Henley, I don’t know, ok? I’m fucking exhausted, I haven’t slept in 3 days and my life was just on the line.” Daniel didn’t mean to snap, but he meant it. Henley’s eyes narrowed into slits. “Fuck you too.” She spun around to turn her back to him and face Jack fully. Daniel’s eyes slid shut.

* * *

Daniel thought he’d gotten away with it, his shoulder was on fire now, and he could feel some blood trickling down his arm, but no one had noticed. Daniel would deal with it when he got to the bathroom, where he kept an emergency first aid kit. Growing up on the streets of New York, you learn basic first aid. Like, how to deal with a stab wound and a gun shot. As he climbed out of the car however… it wasn’t so well hidden. Henley had accidentally caught a part of his hoodie in her bracelet. As Daniel climbed out, his hoodie snagged and yanked his left shoulder back roughly. “Hang on, it’s caught on my bracelet!” Daniel turned his face away, desperately trying to stop the tears from leaking. Henley unattached his hoodie and Daniel walked away quickly, ignoring the other’s shouts. 

* * *

Daniel all but fell into the mutual bathroom and locked it. He grabbed his first aid kit from under the sink and dry swallowed 4 pills of ibuprofen (he thinks) 

Daniel grabs an emergency granola bar and eats it, desperately forcing himself to not throw it back up. The pills won’t work on an empty stomach, Daniel knew that from experience. They’d just come back up. He sat on the closed toilet seat and dug his fingers into his knees while he waited for the pills to kick in. He’d need them to if he was going to take the bullet out and sew it up again. Someone knocked on the door and rattled the door knob. “Danny?” It was Henley. “Hurry up, I need to pee,” Daniel bit his lip and tried to make his voice as steady as possible, “I’m literally just about to get in the shower, I’ll be out in 10 minutes,” Henley sighed and walked away (he presumes)

His shoulder stops throbbing painfully now, so Daniel begins his bullet extraction. He peeled the now ruined hoodie off, the movement jarring his shoulder and causing a sharp pain to run down his arm. Daniel’s vision wavers slightly and he has to grab the counter to stop himself from falling over. His vision cleared up and Daniel began the extraction of his under shirt and t-shirt. 

His left arm is completely numb now, which helps with the lack of pain, but it’s utterly useless. By the time Daniel had gotten his under shirt and t-shirt off, he was a sweating and pale mess. He sat on the closed toilet lid and pressed his head in between his knees, desperately trying to regulate his breathing. Someone knocked on the door again and this time tried jiggling the door knob harder. “Danny, you’ve been in there for half an hour, hurry the fuck up or I’m gonna pee on your bed,” 

Daniel ignored Henley’s rant and eased himself back into a standing position. Daniel’s left arm was beginning to regain it’s feeling, so he had to move quickly. He put the hot water on and waited until the sink was steaming before he put the plug in and dropped the needle in. The needle needed to be sterilised before it was used. He fumbled around for the thread, knowing this was hard enough when he could see, much less when his vision was continuously wavering. 

Suddenly, the lock clicked open and Henley stormed in. 

* * *

Henley was expecting everything: a naked Daniel in the shower (which wouldn’t have bothered her, they’ve been there, done that) a semi-dressed Daniel out of the shower, or a naked Daniel out of the shower.

What she was not expecting, however, was Daniel to be pale, sweaty and shivering all at the same time, his left arm bright red in blood, a needle in the sink and a bullet hole in his shoulder. 

Henley backed up against the door, it slamming shut. “What…the…fuck?” She whispered. Danny shivered slightly, “What?” He bit out, clearly in pain. “What the fuck have you done to your arm!?” Henley asked, her eyes wider than dinner plates. Danny put his right index finger to his lips, “Shut up! I don’t want them knowing!” Henley scoffed and tried to wrap her head around what was happening. “You were seriously going to heal your own fucking bullet wound!? How stupid are you!?” Daniel didn’t answer, but continued to try and put the medical thread through the needle. Henley shook her head and took a deep breath.

_Right now, her friend was in pain and in serious trouble. She needed to help him._

“Give it to me, I’ll do it.” Danny gave the needle over and the thread without even a mumble of protest. This alone was a massive red flag. Henley managed to successfully thread the medical thread through the tiny hole of the needle. Danny was sat on the closed toilet lid, breathing heavily. “Not that I’m trying to put any pressure on you, Henley,” cue several deep breaths which caused Henley’s anxiety to ramp up 10 fold. “But I think I’m gonna pass out soon, everything has just gone airy,"

Shit.

“Ok, stay awake while I stitch it up. I can get you to your room if I have to,” Daniel’s chin trembled in pain but he nodded. “Sing something,” Henley said, an idea coming to her. “No, why?” Daniel responded. “You have to keep talking and I can’t deal with your phoney arrogance now. Sing something,” That managed to crack a smirk. “Can I tell you about my sisters?” He asked, his voice small. Henley’s eyebrows shot up into her hairline, “I never knew you had any sisters! Go for it, as long as it keeps you awake,"

Henley made the first stitch through the skin and tried to ignore the spike of pain in her heart when he winced and grabbed his right knee with his right hand. (Henley had already checked for an exit wound, and luckily there was)

“I used to have 4 sisters, I was the only boy.” Another stitch. Another wince. “Their names were; Zoë, Emma, Michelle and Hayley. I was the oldest of my parents 5, followed by Hayley, Emma, Michelle and then Zoë.” Henley made her third stitch. Daniels face blanched and Henley thought he was going to flake out on her. _Better speed this up._

“What happened? You said you used to have?” Henley tried to keep him awake. “We were in a really bad car accident after my parents had an argument. My mom was driving us all to her moms for the night, but my dad was following us, wasted on booze.” Henley made her 4th stitch. Only 3 or 4 more to go. “Then?” She asked gently. “It was winter, so the roads were already pretty dangerous. I was in the front next to my mom while my sisters were in the back. Hayley and Zoë shared a seat cus they were so small, the belt could comfortably fit across them both.” 5th stitch. Daniel’s hands began shaking slightly and his face went even whiter. “My mom turned a corner to try and lose my dad, but she slid on the ice. We crashed into a tree. No one died, luckily. My mom was getting Emma out of of the car cus her belt had gotten stuck. My dad rounded the same corner and skidded right into my mom’s car, killing her and Emma instantly."

Henley made her 6th stitch, desperately trying not to gasp. “I ran to the bus stop with Hayley, Michelle and Zoë. We desperately tried to grab a bus, but my dad grabbed us first. He grabbed Zoë by her hair and tried to drag her into the car. She bit him and ran off towards our nan’s house. I stood infant of Hayley, taking a punch to the head. Hayley later told me than Michelle kicked him in his balls and his shins, before they grabbed me and ran off after Zoë."

Henley made her 7th stitch and grabbed the medical bandages from the first aid pack. She began wrapping it up. “Did you ever get to your nan’s?” Danny nodded then listed. Henley wrapped it up tighter and quicker. “Hayley and Michelle dragged me nearly half a mile to our nan’s house. We got there ok, apart from my killer concussion. Zoë was never found.” Henley felt some tears worm their way into her eyes. She grabbed the medical tape and secured the bandage up. “How old were you all?” Daniels eyes unfocused, Henley could see that much from how large his pupils went. Then he fell right into her lap. Henley gasped and made sure to stop his shoulder hitting anything. “Come on, let’s get you to your room for some rest.” Henley all but dragged Daniel up from the ground and lead him out of the bathroom and directly across the hall to his bedroom. She gently lowered him onto the bed and took off his shoes and jeans, leaving him in just his boxer shorts. (They’d seen it all before, so it didn’t matter)

“Wait,” Daniel quietly called before Henley could leave. She turned around. “You wanted to know how old we were?” Henley pushed the door to. “I was 14, Hayley was 12, Emma was 10, Michele was 8 and Zoë was 5.” Henley bit her lip to stop herself from talking. Daniel didn’t need any more stimulation this evening, he needed rest. “I’ll leave your painkillers on your bedside table for you to take tomorrow morning, ok?” She said. Danny nodded and turned onto his right side. Almost instantly, there was a quiet snoring, singling that he had fallen asleep.

Henley prayed to God for the first time that evening. “Please make sure Danny lives and that I never have to do that again,” She’d asked him. 

Henley didn’t know if she believed in God or not, but she needed something this evening.

And an all-powerful (fake or not) Deity was just the thing she needed. 


	6. Broken leg.

TAGS INCLUDED/ADDED: (Broken bone! Pain! Freaking out! Passing out!)

‘…’ = thoughts 

“…” = speech

_Italics = past._

* * *

_It was about they Eye, he thinks. About how they’d basically tossed them to one side when they were finished with them. Henley was saying that she’d leave if it kept going. Daniel had snorted and replied with, “Yeah, you said that you’d leave as my assistant at least twice a day for a whole 6 months. I doubt you’ll leave, Henley.” Henley had scoffed and rolled her eyes, “Well maybe I felt sorry for you. A lonely man who became a major control freak!” Daniel felt anger rush through his veins, but didn’t say anything. He continued to shuffle the deck of cards in his hands._

_Apparently his ignorance of Henley’s rant pissed her off, because the next thing he knew, a remote had smacked him right on his forehead. Daniel dropped his cards in surprise and pressed a hand to the already throbbing area. “What the fuck, Henley!?” He’d yelled. Henley had just stood there, fuming in silence. “Oh…kay… Welp, I’m gonna go and find something to do… you coming Jackie-boy?” Merritt had slowly spoke in the middle of their staring contest. “Yup!” Jack had quickly replied, vaulting over the loveseat he was in and bolting out of the door, Merritt following quickly after._

_“You’re a fucking psycho, Henley.” Daniel seethed while rubbing his head gingerly. Henley didn’t say anything else. Daniel made his way over to the freezer and grabbed a bag of peas and pressed it to his head. A dull ache had began to work it’s way through his neck, meaning a migraine was on it’s way. Great._

_“I’m sorry I threw the remote, Danny. You just pissed me off,” Henley eventually said. “And? You piss me off sometimes, I don’t go throwing shit at you!” Daniel yelled back. Henley scoffed, “You’re such a jackass, ya know that? I try to apologise, and you still, still, make it about you!” Henley sneered. She stormed off to her room and slammed the door to hard it made the light fixture shake a little. Daniel rolled his eyes and sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose tightly._

_~_

_Daniel had long since discarded the bag of peas and was sat blankly staring at the wall while his new migraine destroyed his head. Henley had come out twice, once to grab some water and the other to grab a pack of crisps. After a little while (Daniel guessed it was about an hour or so) Henley came out of her room and sat in the living area with him. Neither of them said anything, but they just sat in silence… for about 5 minutes._

_“Danny, I am sorry. I shouldn’t have yelled like that,” Henley said, not looking at him. Daniel didn’t say anything for 2 reasons. 1) his head was still fucking killing him and 2) He was still pissed off at her._

_Henley had obviously taken his silence of another jackass move, as she’d scoffed quietly to herself and rolled her eyes. “I was apologising to you, ya know?” She sneered, apology long forgotten. “I heard you,” Daniel had replied, still not looking at her. “Aren’t you gonna say anything back?"_

_Daniel was confused, “No? Why would I?” Henley’s’ face turned an interesting shade of red: nearly matching her hair colour. “Seriously!? You were rude as well! Decent people apologise for being a dick, that’s how the human race work!” Henley yelled, standing up. “You threw a fucking remote at me! I’m not going to apologise for something you did!” Daniel was now stood up as well, the 2 in yet another row. “Because you pissed ME OFF!” Henley screamed._

_Daniel threw his hands in the air before letting them hit his legs. “I can’t deal with you right now,” He’d said and stormed out of the apartment, slamming the door._

* * *

'In hindsight, storming out of the apartment, seeing double thanks to his still raging migraine, probably wasn’t the best of ideas’ Daniel thought to himself as he lay at the bottom of the stairs. His left leg throbbed painfully causing tears to burn in his eyes. Daniel tipped his head against the bottom step and groaned loudly. Henley probably thought he was throwing shit and wouldn’t bother to come and check on him. The only way he’d get help is if he could stomach standing up (which he couldn’t, he’d tried several times already) or wait for Jack and Merritt to come back, which could be hours from now.

* * *

_Daniel stormed out of the apartment, letting the door slam behind him. He pressed his fists to his eyes, trying to stop the pulsating in his eyes._

_Unfortunately, Daniel hadn’t realised how close he was to the steps. His left leg took another step forward, expecting solid ground, but didn’t meet it. Daniel tumbled half-way down the stairs, smacking his head yet again. Blinding pain coursed through his body as his left leg snapped back at an unnatural angle. Daniel fell the rest of the way, unconscious._

_~~~_

**_Henley._ **

_Henley, admittedly, got wound up very easily. She wasn’t entirely fair to Daniel, she had thrown the remote first… Henley had been in her room now for about an hour. Daniel stormed out just over that and hadn’t come back yet. Something was nagging her to go and check on him, even if it meant ringing him. Henley yelled into her pillow before she grabbed her phone and dialled his number._

_Straight to voicemail. Strange, Daniel didn’t often let his phone go to voicemail. Henley ran again and again. She got the same answer both times. Henley left her room and shrugged on a coat, deciding to try and find him. Normally her gut wasn’t wrong, but something was telling her something wasn’t right. It might be the overwhelming guilt she was feeling, doubled thanks to her hormones, but something_ definitely _wasn’t right._

_Henley would only look for 15 minutes and then she’d come back. If Daniel still wasn’t back by 8, she’d go out again but with Merritt and Jack as well._

_Henley put her phone into her jacket pocket and grabbed her keys. She opened the door of the apartment and made sure to lock it. It wasn’t in the nicest area, but one could never be too cautious._

* * *

Daniel was in shock. At least he thinks so. He’s not sure, everything feels very weird now. He couldn’t feel any more pain from his leg, nor his head. In fact, he felt very… airy? If that’s even a word. He could feel his body slowly going cold and his stomach was beginning to bubble and turn ominously. Daniel knew he’d definitely broken his leg, thanks to the unnatural angle it was bent at. He could also feel a large lump behind his head. 

Suddenly though, as if it was a gift from God himself, someone’s door closed from somewhere upstairs. Daniel breathed a sigh of relief, knowing someone was coming to help. 

* * *

**Henley, present.**

Henley walked out of the hallway and reached the stairs. “Oh fuck!” She yelled, seeing someone passed out at the bottom. Henley carefully made her way down the stairs, feeling her heart sink. She knew that dark blue hoodie. “Danny! Danny can you hear me?!” She yelled, stepping over his body. Daniel didn’t move or open his eyes. “Fuck, DANIEL!” She screamed, praying to whoever was listening, that he wasn’t dead. 

Daniel jolted awake with a loud groan. Henley was immediately asking questions. Looking into his eyes alone, she could tell he had a bad concussion, his pupils were almost as large as his eyes. Then she saw his leg. 

It took Henley all her strength to not throw up when she saw how badly broken it obviously was. The knee was bent the complete opposite way, and his ankle was snapped to the left. Henley pulled out her phone and dialled 911. 

“911, where is the location of the emergency?” The operator asked. "45 East Evan Street, New York.” Henley replied, grabbing Daniel’s hand and squeezing it tightly. “What service do you require?” The operator spoke. “Uh, I need an ambulance. My friend has fallen down the stairs and doesn’t look good. His eyes are really blown and his leg looks really badly broken!” Henley replied. “Ok, try not to move him. If he needs to be sick, make sure he’s on his non-injured side. Sometimes people in shock and pain can vomit, it’s normal. The ambulance is 20 minutes away.” Henley thanked the operator and hung up. 

Daniel was frowning and blinking sluggishly. He tried to push himself up, but Henley stopped him. “You can’t sit up, Danny. What do you need?” She asked. Daniel didn’t say anything. He suddenly leant to the side and puked. 

If Henley hated anything, it was a sick person. Sure, Danny wasn’t actually _sick_ sick. But he was still puking. Henley bit the bullet and let him use her right side as a leaning post, seeing as he couldn’t hold himself up properly. Feeling his body relax slightly, Henley pulled him back and made him lie on the floor (on the opposite side of the vomit) on his right side in case he needed to puke again.

Daniel continued to blink sluggishly as he stared at the door. “Can you talk to me?” Henley asked. She’d read somewhere that having a concussed person speak was a good indication that there wasn’t any brain damage. Daniel turned his head slightly to frown at her before blinking at the door again. “Merritt? Jack?” He asked. Henley was surprised to hear how slurred it was. “They’re out at the shops, remember?” Daniel had nodded, and didn’t speak again until the paramedics arrived.

* * *

Henley was allowed to ride with them, but she sat silently as the paramedics checked Daniel over and asked him questions. A hand on her shoulder brought her back to reality. A female paramedic was sitting next to her. She smiled sadly, “How’re you doing, Miss?” Henley looked at her on-and-off lover. He was in a neck brace, tied down to a gurney. Seeing him so unmoving and so unresponsive made her feel sick. “Not great if I’m being honest. I’ve just had to help my friend stay awake from a really bad fall!” The female paramedic, whose name was Alice, shrugged slightly. “I know, it’s not great. But you did a great job. He didn’t die, he’s in the ambulance now, and he didn’t choke on his puke. You did better than most people would. Did you get him to say anything? He’s not verbally responding to my colleagues over there. He’s passed all the pen tests and finger tests, but he’s not speaking."

Henley bit her cheek slightly. “Kinda? I asked him to talk to me and all he did was say our other friends names. I think he was asking for them. Shit, I better let them know.” Henley replied. Alice smiled slightly. “Ok. You can go into the waiting room and call them. How long was it before you found him?” Henley suddenly felt a crushing guilt and blinked away tears. “An hour or so? We’d had a really bad argument and he stormed out.” Alice nodded. “Even if you found him within 20 minutes, he’d still be in surgery for this. From what I can see, which admittedly isn’t much, as he fell, he fell sideways and got stuck. The momentum of his fall made his leg and ankle snap back to allow for the force to push him through.” Henley quietly nodded and stayed quiet until they reached the hospital where she called Jack and Merritt.

~

As expected, they’d rushed straight to the hospital asking how Daniel was. Trouble was, none of them knew. The doctor hadn’t come out yet, and they was sat there for nearly 4 hours. Daniel had been rushed straight into the surgery. They’d decided that they’d take it in shifts.

Henley and Merritt would have the first 2 hours of sleep, while Jack kept an ear out. Another 3 hours passed before the doctor came out. Merritt had accidentally dozed off again, and Jack was sleeping. It was around 3 in the morning. “Jason Adams?” The doctor had called out. No one responded. “Thats us.” Henley spoke, kicking Jack and Merritt awake. “I’ll walk you to his room,"

Once they’d left the waiting room, the doctor spoke. “He’s stable right now, but he’s resting. We managed to heal the majority of the break in the leg and stabilise the ankle with a few temporary pins. However, we’ll have to do another surgery in a few days to correct the ankle, but we didn’t this evening. A) The morphine was wearing out and B) his oxygen and heart levels weren’t holding steady anymore. We decided not to risk it.” They continued walking for a few more rooms before they reached an elevator. The doctor got in and pressed the 5th floor. “The pins will hold the ankle in place so Mr Adams can partially recover before we sort the ankle out next. But, his body needs time to rest and continue healing his knee. He will need to go through PT for around 6 months to a year, depending on how much and how well the bones heal. Also, he did sustain quite a bad concussion, so do be quiet when you see him next. The concussion will heal itself within the week,” 

They now approached Daniels room. “If he is sleeping, we have put 1 bed up. Unfortunately, 2 of you will have to leave. One can stay though. Have a good evening."

“Thank you so much, doctor!” The three called before opening the door.

Daniel was indeed, asleep, when they walked in. His whole left leg was in a sling. There was a thick plaster around his knee, finishing just before his ankle, which was just loosely wrapped up. He had a hospital gown on, which Henley could see up until his mid chest which was the covered by the hospital blanket. His head was tilted slightly towards the door with his mouth slightly open. Small puffs left and entered as he slept deeply, influenced by the strong pain killers. His hair was damp with sweat and slicked back, obviously done by himself in his sleep.

“Henley, you can take the bed,” Merritt announced. Normally she’d argue, but Henley didn’t. She felt too exhausted and guilty to. She managed to force a small smile however. “I presume you two aren’t going to leave?” Merritt and Jack smirked. “No. I’ll camp on the sofa,” Merritt replied, already lying down. “I’ll have the small chair, I guess?” Henley would have offered to share with him, but the bed was barely big enough for herself. Instead, she threw him her pillow. “I can ball up Danny’s hoodie or something. At least you’ve got something of comfort tonight."

The three slept soundly in the room with their unconscious friend. They didn’t know that he woke up briefly around 8 am. He saw them all sleeping in his room and smiled slightly before he fell back asleep, a small smile on his face.


	7. Stab wound.

TAGS INCLUDED/ADDED: (Blood! Pain! Freaking out! Passing out!)

*just incidentally, I am very well aware that you don’t pull the knife out, but it needed to be done in order for this story to work.

SUPER LONG ONE FOR A CHANGE!!

* * *

** Henley. **

East Evans street wasn’t in the best area, to put it lightly. It wasn’t _dangerous_ per se, but it definitely wasn’t up there in the top 10 best areas. There was a lot of gang activity and stabbings. Mind you, that pretty much summed up the whole of New York unless you shit golden bars, in which case, you’re fine.

After the final show at 5 Pointz, the 4 horsemen retreated back their dirty apartment on East Evans street. Merritt immediately rushed to the sofa and fell asleep and Jack dropped down onto the small loveseat where he began shuffling his cards… again. Daniel made his way over to the large window and sat down on the small seat, glancing out of the grimey window and saw another gang attack.

Henley made her way over to the fridge, obviously about to prepare some form of food for them all to eat. “Ugh! Who ate the last of the pasta?” Henley asked, addressing the 3 boys. Jack guiltily rose a hand. “Sorry, I didn’t know it was for anyone else.” Henley rolled her eyes and shrugged on her coat. “Ok, I’m off out to get takeaway. What does everyone want?"

“Margarita with pepperoni please, Darlin’,” Merritt chimed from the sofa. “Meat feast please!” Jack added. Henley turned to face Daniel. “Come on Danny, I don’t have all evening,” She said, sounding exhausted. 

To be fair, they all were about to drop dead. Daniel stood up from the window seat and slipped his hoodie on. “I’ll go with you, I don’t know yet.” Henley rolled her eyes, but didn’t protest or anything. Secretly, Henley was glad someone was going with her. 

It’s not that she couldn’t take care of herself, but some of the people that were around the apartment weren’t exactly the most desirable people. The two made their way out of the apartment and slowly made their way down the street, not saying anything. Henley had a large trench coat on, with the hood up in the hopes of A) Blending in easier, and B) hoping no one spots her. Daniel hadn’t put too much effort into hiding himself, but mind you, he had an average face. Nothing particularly stood out, except for his trade-mark fluffy hair, which was safely tucked under a hood. 

Henley however… stood out like a sore thumb. Bright red hair and famous for large arenas and daring escapes? 

Not easy to hide.

Anyway, Henley just enjoyed not having to speak but the peacefulness of the walk to the pizza shop. It was a nice change from the past year. They walked into the shop and ordered what they wanted. The staff in there were a little rude, but that might just be Henley’s perspective. Daniel was equally as rude, so maybe it was a New Yorker thing? Either way, neither party seemed to be upset or angry by the apparent common rudeness, so Henley kept quiet. 

Once they’d grabbed the pizzas and argued briefly about Daniel’s taste in pizza _(“you can’t have pineapple on your pizza you heathen!” Henley scoffed. “Yes I can. Watch me!” Daniel had replied, taking a large bite of the pizza)_ they made their way home. Henley went to walk down the normal way, but Daniel’s arm in front of her chest stopped her. “Do you wanna go first?” She asked, confused. Daniel shook his head. “No, I don’t like the look of it. It’s giving me goosebumps.” Henley rolled her eyes and continued walking, “Danny, we walk this way every time. It’s fine,” Daniel looked like he wanted to protest, but he stayed quiet and followed her through the alleyway. 

Daniel’s sudden gasp about a foot behind her made Henley freeze. “Give me your wallets, and there won’t be a problem.” A male voice sneered from behind her. Henley raised her arms in the air as a sign of defence. “I-I-I don’t have my p-p-purse,” She stuttered out. “Bullshit!” The man yelled. Only now, did Henley notice the shiny metal object poking into Danny’s neck. He to, was frozen. “N-no. H-he p-p-paid for it,” Henley continued. “No funny business!” The man warned, beckoning Henley to get the wallet out. She took the pizzas and put them on the floor, before reaching into Daniel’s back pocket to grab his wallet out. She handed it over to the psychotic man. He suddenly grinned like a shark. “That’s a nice watch you’ve got there… hand it over.” Henley’s heart sunk. “B-but my mother gave it to me… before she died.” _Not quite true, but true enough._ “Did I stutter? Hand it over, otherwise ya boyfriend ‘ere gets this in his neck.” For emphasis, he dug the knife in a little deeper. Daniel’s eyes widened in fear. Henley slowly unstrapped her family heirloom and handed it over. 

In the blink of an eye, the man snatched the knife away from Danny’s neck, and moved it to Henley’s instead. Henley had never felt more afraid in her life. “Now, here’s how this is gonna go. You… are gonna hand me every valuable thing you have on you right now, otherwise redhead here will be headless!” Daniel looked Henley right in the eyes before taking off his (probably really expensive) watch. Instead of handing it to the maniac, he lobbed it at his head. The psycho yelled and dropped the knife. Daniel grabbed Henley’s hand and dragged her through the alleyway as quick as he could.

Unfortunately, the maniac was quicker. It must of been an incredibly unlucky shot, but the guy threw the knife. Daniel turned around to see where the guy was, and yanked Henley’s arm hard enough to make her stumble to the left harshly. 

He let go of her hand, leaving Henley to fall on her ass. “What the fuck, Danny!?” Henley stood up, rubbing her ass. She looked over and saw Daniel with his hands on his knees, bent over at the waist. 

Henley turned around to see if the psychopath was still there, and was pleasantly pleased to find he wasn’t. He must of bolted after he threw the knife.

“He’s gone now, Danny. We should get going.” She spoke, breathlessly. When Daniel didn’t move, Henley tried again. “Danny, come on. I don’t want him to come back. Stop being a drama queen.” Henley hadn’t meant to be harsh, but she was just held at knife point and just wanted to get home. 

Henley turned away and began marching out of the alley way, but stopped when she heard a small groan and thud. Henley rolled her eyes and turned around, expecting to see Daniel being a drama queen. Instead, she saw the knife imbedded in his lower back. 

“Shit! Daniel! Danny!” Henley yelled, running back over. All he did was groan quietly. The area surrounding the knife was red with blood, and it looked like it had no intention of slowing down. Henley nearly called Merritt, but realised her phone was also taken. So was Daniels.

Henley had no other choice but to help carry him back to the apartment, where she could call for help. First, she took off her jacket, which was underneath her trench coat. She then took off her coat and handed Danny the sleeve, to which he looked at confused. “Bite down on it, this is gonna hurt.” He slowly brought the leather into his mouth and bit down, waiting.

Without any warning, Henley yanked out the knife and pushed down on the wound with all her strength using her hoodie.

The sound that came out of Daniels mouth made Henley cry. “I’m so sorry.” She kept whispering to him. After 5 minutes or so of pushing on the wound, Henley tied it up around his was it really tightly. “Ok, try and get on your knees. I’m gonna have to help you back to the apartment. I’d carry you, but I can’t. Plus, that jackass stole my phone.” 

Looking at Danny’s face made fresh tears come to her eyes. He was almost as white as his shirt, his lips were slightly blue and trembling, and his eyes (god, his eyes) were so wide and full of pain and terror.

Henley grabbed his left arm and helped pull him up from laying on the ground. He swayed dangerously, his face blanching even further. For a second, Henley thought he’d pass out. She steadied her hold on him just in case he did. Luckily he didn’t, although he did lean most of his weight on her. 

They slowly made their way to the apartment, ignoring stares of passerby’s. “He’s just a bit drunk,” or “He’s sprained his ankle,” 

The whole walk back, Henley felt unreasonably guilty for some unknown reason. Her heart clenched painfully every time Danny moaned or groaned in pain. “We’re nearly there, it’s just round this corner, Danny.” She could see a fresh sheen of sweat on his face, which was even paler, if that was even possible.

They eventually made it into the apartment, and made their way to the unreliable lift. Luckily, the lift was working today, so they got in and made their way up. Suddenly, a whole lot of weight pushed against Henley’s side, causing her to “oof” quietly. “Danny? Are you awake?” She asked. He didn’t say anything, but she felt his head move up and down. The lift jolted unsteadily as it reached the 6th floor. Henley was practically dragging Daniel by this point. “Danny? Can you kick or knock on the door? I can’t.” Henley asked, feeling insanely guilty for asking him to do anything, given his current state. Daniel raised his right fist and knocked on the door. It wasn’t hard enough to be heard if you weren’t listening for it. Henley hoped to god that Merritt wasn’t asleep or in the shower. 

They waited for a few seconds, the only sound being Daniels raspy breathing. He suddenly groaned and pressed a hand to his head. “Henley, I don’t feel good,” 

Daniel had never admitted that he felt ill or was in pain, so him admitting this really spoke volumes about how much pain he was truly in. Henley would have squeezed his hand, but she was too busy on keeping them both up right.

Suddenly, as if God was feeling generous, the door opened. “Holy shit, Daniel! Whats the matter?!” Jack had answered the door. Henley just pushed through the doorway and lead him to the sofa. She went to gently lower him onto his stomach so he wasn’t on his back, but he slipped from her grasp. 

Daniel landed with all of his 159 pounds (11 stone or 72kg) on his back. 

He arched it slightly and cried out. “Fuck! I’m so sorry!” Henley had yelled, desperately pulling him so he was lying on his stomach. Henley could hear him sniffling quietly as he cried to himself. Henley grabbed the phone that was in the receiver and dialled 911.

* * *

( **Henley** , _911 operator_ , Bellevue Hospital, Danny _ **.**_ )

_“911, where is the location of your emergency?"_

**“45 East Evans street, New York,”** Henley was biting her finger nails as she spoke to the operator.

_“Ok, and what service do you require?"_

**“Ambulance,"**

_“Ok Miss. The ambulance is on the way now. ETA is 25 minutes."_

**“Ok, thank you."**

_“I’m going to forward you to Bellevue Hospital, they can talk you through what to do."_

* * *

"Bellevue Hospital, what is the problem?"

**“My boyfriend has been stabbed in the back."**

“Right ok, Miss…?"

**“Reeves. Alicia Reeves.”** The others had decided long ago that they would not use their real names when talking to people they don’t know. It reduced the risk of them being found.

“Miss Reeves. Ok, had the knife already been removed?"

**“Yes,"**

“Ah, that makes the problem slightly more complicated…"

**“Shit, I’m sorry. I thought I’d pull it out cus it looked really dirty which means it was probably infected!”** Henley could see Jack fretting over the super pale Danny, asking him if he wanted water or anything like that. All Daniel did (all he probably could do) was groan quietly and say it hurt.

“It’s ok, people panic in the moment. Have you staunched the bleeding?"

**“Kind of… I used my hoodie to press on it for a while then tied it around his waist really tightly."**

“It’s not ideal, but it’ll do. Who is the person that has been stabbed?"

**“My Boyfriend, James Adams.”** Again, false names. Plus, if she said she was only a friend, chances are they wouldn’t let her go through with him when he did.

“I need you to pass him the phone, ok? I need to ask him some questions."

**“Ok."**

* * *

Henley gently tapped Daniels shoulder and handed him the phone. _Its the hospital_ she mouthed. He nodded and pressed the phone to his ear.

* * *

“Hello?” He asked. God, if his voice was any indication that something was wrong… it was quiet and full of pain. If you listened close enough, you could hear the slight tremble.

“Hello Mr Adams, is it ok if I ask some questions?"

“Uh… yeah?” Henley sat next to his legs on the floor and eavesdropped on the conversation. She pressed her head against them, below the knee. Even though she wasn’t massively fond of him, he was still a good friend.

“Great. Ok, number 1) can you rate your pain on a scale of 1-10, 1 being no pain whatsoever, 10 being pure agony."

“7 or 8?” _Daniel never admitted to being in pain._

“Ok… where were you stabbed?"

“My lower back, I think..."

“What is your current position? I’m going to presume that you haven’t got any weight on your back right now?"

“I’m laying on my stomach, on my couch."

“Ok, that’s probably the best position to be in right now. Question 4) How long ago were you stabbed? On a guess?"

* * *

Daniel suddenly dropped the phone with a light moan. “Henley, take the call…. everything’s just gone airy and I think I’m gonnapassout” he slurred the last part of the sentence, and Henley’s worry only increased 10 fold.

* * *

“Mr Adams? Hello?"

**“It’s me again, he’s just gone all weird, saying he feels airy and tired.”** Henley picked up the call again.

“Ok, Miss Reeves. The ambulance is less than 10 minutes away now, it should be pulling up relatively soon. Try not to let him sleep, he’ll need to be awake for the paramedics. I’ll need you or another occupant to either unlock the door so they can come in, or open it."

**“Ok, I’ll get my friend to open it.”** Henley told Jack to unlock the door and clear a path so they could get to Daniel with no resistance.

“Great. Ok, I need you to feel Mr Adam’s pulse. I want you to count every beat for me. I’ll tell you when to stop."

**“Ok. 1…2…3…4…5,”** The operator stopped her after 60 seconds. Henley had counted 115 beats.

“Ok, it seems a bit thready and quick, which I’m not too happy about. How’s his breathing?"

**“How do I check that?"**

“What you do, is you either place a mirror or something that reflects breath under his nose or your hand under it. I’ll need you to tell me each time he takes a breath. Ideally, I’d like the phone to be near as well so I can hear."

**“Ok. Breath in…… breath out…… breath in……breath out,”** She continued doing this for a minute.

“His breathing is slow and raspy. This could indicate an infection. Describe his physical appearance right now."

**“He’s really pale, he’s shivering and shaking, his cheeks are flushed, but he’s running hot. His lips are also kind of blue?"**

“Ok, it sounds like he may have an infection. I can’t tell for sure however, because I can’t see him."

**“Ok… will he be ok?”** Henley couldn’t help the worry from seeping into her voice.

“The paramedics are trained to deal with this kind of thing, Miss Reeves. They will make sure he survives this."

**“I’m scared… I don’t want him to die.”** Suddenly, Henley began crying. Daniel’s life was on the line, all because she hadn’t listened to him about going down the alley.

“Miss Reeves, he won’t die. You’ve done everything you can, he’ll be ok. The ambulance is approaching your street now. Do you want me to stay on the line until they get there?"

**“Is there anything else I can do? I feel useless."**

“No, no other tests can be performed unless I can physically see him."

**“Ok..."**

“Ok, apart from this, have a good evening, Miss Reeves.”

**“Thank you so much.”** Henley wasn’t going to have a good evening, far from it actually.

* * *

The rest of the evening passed in a blur. Henley had ridden to the hospital in the ambulance, watching in horror as they tried to bring Daniel’s heart rate and oxygen levels back up. She couldn’t feel anything, all she felt was a strong numbness. 

At one point, Henley was aware that she’d been sick in a kidney dish and began shaking. A paramedic who wasn’t being used came and sat with her, blocking her view. “It’s best you don’t watch this, ma’am.” She didn’t anymore, but focused on her blood stained shoes.

~

Daniel had been rushed into surgery as soon as they got to the hospital. Henley was taken into a small room, just outside of the waiting room where a nurse was waiting. The nurse had explained that she was in shock and should stay in this room for a while to recover her senses. Seeing something that traumatic was going to leave scars. 

Henley ended up being in that room, alone with a cup of water and the ticking tocking of the clock for around 3 hours. Merritt and Jack had come to sit in with her, but when they received no response, they left for the waiting room.

Henley ended up catching a nap on one of the larger seats. It was either that or pass out. When she eventually woke up again, the time on the clock had changed from 8:50pm to 02:30am. Henley had slept nearly 6 hours. Jack and Merritt had also fallen asleep. 

She got up and walked over to the main desk where she asked about Daniel. “He came out of surgery about half an hour ago. They wanted to get him settled before they brought in any visitors. Plus, the nurse saw you three asleep and left you alone.” Henley’s heart rose slightly, “Does that mean we can go and see him?” The receptionist shook her head. “The doctor will come out and get you when he is satisfied that Mr Adams is comfortable.” Henley went back to her seat, annoyed and sad. “But he is stable,” The nurse added with a small smile.

And that was good enough.


	8. Panic attack.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TAGS INCLUDED/ADDED: (Anxiety! Panic attacks! Abuse! Mentions of past abuse!)

**ANOTHER LONG CHAPTER!!!**

* * *

Daniel was no stranger to panic attacks. In fact, he was very well acquainted with them. 

His first attack happened when his parents’ divorced when he was just 7 years old. Danny, obviously, had no idea what was going on. His little sister, who was only 3, began crying when she saw what state he was in. This only made the attack worse.

Eventually the attack passed.

They became a regular thing. Daniel would normally have one at least once a month from about the age of 11. Then he left when he was 14. His mother remarried an abusive asshole. He abused Daniel, mentally, physically and sexually.

He never raped him or anything, but he would sneak in and take photo’s of Daniel when he was changing from school or from a shower. Daniel had told his mother and showed her the photos, but she didn’t believe him. Apparently he was an intelligent boy who could stage this with no problems. Then the jackass started degrading him and throwing him around.

Daniel had only lived with him for 3 years before he left. Jackass never hurt his mother or sister, only him. So Daniel stole his debit card and withdrew a large sum and left Chicago for New York.

* * *

Whenever anyone mentions anything about Chicago or his previous life, it throws him into a nasty attack. However, sometimes absolutely nothing can set the attack off. Be it a nightmare, the way the books are arranged, or a sudden change. For example, when Henley left. Daniel had one of the worst panic attacks of his life then. Henley was the only one who was clued in on how bad they can get. He’d only had 2 in the year and a half he was with the horsemen. 

The attack was so bad, it caused Daniel to pass out. No one knew. He was left there, suffering silently. The attacks picked up frequency after Henley had left, almost twice a month. Daniel began to seclude himself in his room more and more. 

He eventually became very aware of the symptoms before he had one. Normally, he’d wake up feeling like he was going to be sick, he wouldn’t eat or drink, he’d go through hot flushes, dizziness and faintness, etc. 

Daniel’s attacks subsided somewhat back down to one a month when the horsemen received new plans for a new heist. Knowing the symptoms helped a lot because when Daniel felt nauseous or dizzy, he would stay in his room and wait for the attack to pass.

It normally followed after no sleep or a nightmare, which, normally was a 50/50 draw on what would ruin his day. 

Another large indicator would be his agitation at everything. When he was staying at a shitty motel in New York when he was about 17, the curtains blowing the wrong way and the pole holding them up was creaking set him off on an anger spree. He’d thrown the pillow at the rail and then punched and screamed into it.

* * *

* * *

* * *

Daniel had gone to bed the night before feeling angry at Merritt, Jack and Lula… _especially Lula._

_“Is he always like this?” Lula asked the room, meaning Daniel. He rolled his eyes and sneered at her, “Only to people I don’t like,” Lula had sighed at him and glared. “Is there a reason you don’t like me? Or is it just your personality?” Daniel could see Merritt and Jack glancing at each other, worried. God knows they know once Daniel’s in an argument, he won’t quit. He and Henley went toe-to-toe nearly every day._

_“No, I just don’t like you. Don’t take it personally.” Daniel had snapped back. Lula scoffed, “Uh, yes, I’m taking it personally. Why are you such an asshole?!” They were both stood up now, viciously glaring at each other. “Lula, it’s ok,” Jack had spoken quietly, placing a hand on her shoulder. She shrugged it off with a scoff, “No it isn’t Jack! He can’t treat everyone like shit and get away with it!” Daniel had turned around to leave for his room, worried that he’d hit someone if he stayed in there anymore. “There he goes again! Leaving when he’s wrong!” Lula shouted. Daniel had swung back around and stalked over. Merritt stood up from the couch, ready to intercept if he needed to._

_(it hurt that they thought Daniel would hit a girl)_

_“I’m leaving because if I stay in this room any longer, I’m gonna hit someone. I don’t care who.” Daniel had spat, venom laced in his voice._

_It happened so quickly, no one had any time to react. Lula pulled her arm back and snacked him right across the face._

_The whole room was silent. Merritt’s face was formed in a shocked expression, Jack was staring at the both of them, caution in his eyes. Lula was still glaring at him, but her eyes were shining in fear. Daniel stared back at her, eyes wide._

_Daniel could feel his chest begin to tighten and his eyes began to water, not just from the pain of her slap. He spun around and walked away. Just before he reached his room, he turned his head and glared with so much hatred in his eyes, that Lula visibly flinched. “You might have made your way into the Horsemen, but don’t think you deserve to be here. You were just lucky. You have no talent, and nothing special. You’re a spoiled little brat, who needs putting in her place. Slap me again, and you’ll get just that.” Then he slammed his door._

_Daniel dropped onto his bed and picked up his roll of blue tack. He rolled it between his fingers, the stimulation bringing him back to reality. The blue tack flexibly rolled between his index finger and middle finger. The warm object kept Daniel grounded enough so he didn’t fall into another attack. The slap from Lula brought back horrible memories from his mother’s own hand._

_Eventually, Daniel managed to get his breathing under control enough to avoid the majority of the attack. The rest of the evening he just felt like crying._

* * *

Daniel woke up the next morning knowing an attack was probably on the way. If last nights freak out was _any_ indication, it was gonna be a bad one when it arrived. 

Daniel stood up and walked over to his pill drawer, where he grabbed his antidepressants and GAD reducers. He dry swallowed 2 pills from each bottle and drunk a swig of water.

He opened his bedroom door and made his way to the kitchen to grab himself some breakfast. Daniel turned around to eat it at the breakfast island, which overlooked the dining area. Daniel could hear Lula’s voice from the front room, and Jack’s. It sounded like Jack was trying to calm her down.

Daniels nightmare came rushing back to his mind, and he pulled out the blue tack from his pocket and began rubbing it between his fingers again.

* * *

Merritt had basically dragged Daniel into the living area where they were to discuss the new plans from the Eye. Daniel had sat on the opposite sofa to Lula, as far away from her as he could get. Jack was sat next to her, and Merritt was next to him. Lula was glaring daggers at Daniel the whole meeting, and he reciprocated those glares. 

Merritt cleared his throat loudly before continuing the plans. Daniel became completely sucked in. These plans were just as detailed and thorough as the last ones, possibly even more. 

“So…uh…are you two ever gonna speak again?” Merritt asked. Daniel briefly glanced up before looking back down again, without saying a word. Lula had scoffed, “Uh, when he apologizes.” Daniel bit back a nasty remark. Merritt sighed lightly before slapping his thighs.

Involuntarily, Daniel flinched.

* * *

_The loud slap threw him back about 15 years ago. Daniel had just turned 10. His mom and stepdad had just announced her new pregnancy. Daniel’s little sister, Amy, who was only 6, had started crying when they did. Their mom started to ask why Amy was crying and wasn’t she excited for a new baby in the house? Amy had just wailed louder and yelled that she wouldn’t be loved if the new baby came along. Daniel had hugged her tightly, knowing how it felt for a new baby to arrive… except he was three when he was told. Amy was 6. That’s quite a difference in age. But anyway, their mom had tried to comfort her, but Amy just told her to go away. Their mom had sighed and left the room, clearly upset. Their stepdad had glared at them both before following his mom out._

_Daniel turned to console his distraught sister by saying about how he felt when she was coming along and how he wouldn’t change it for the world._

_Amy seemed to calm down somewhat. Suddenly, the door to their bedroom slammed open. Their stepdad stormed in, anger clearly written all over his face. “You little brat! You’ve made your mother cry!” He sneered at Amy, reaching back to hit her. Daniel stood in the way and took the hit. Amy yelled his name as he hit the ground, crying in pain. “Pussy,” His stepdad had spat before kicking him sharply in the ribs. He slammed the door as he left._

* * *

Daniel began playing with the blue tack again, desperately trying to refocus himself. He didn’t look up from the plans. He felt slightly nauseous, his stomach was bubbling and rolling. Daniel looked up from the plan and saw Jack watching him worried. “What?” Daniel had snapped. He could see Lula’s eyes narrow. “Ya know, he’s just asking if you’re ok. Ya don’t have to be such a jackass.” Daniel felt his anger and panic increase. Jack put a hand on Lula’s arm to calm her. “Lula, it’s fine. Something’s clearly bothering him,” Daniel swallowed thickly, and tried to regulate his breathing. “It’s nothing, let’s just read the plans and finish. I’m feeling cooped up in here.” Daniel had replied, completely ignoring Lula’s glare. Jack just sighed and continued talking about the plan. 

Daniel tuned out at some point during Jack’s speaking. His stomach was still twisting dangerously. His vision had started to go fuzzy at the edges and breathing felt hard. He was briefly aware of how cold he felt, but he knew he was hot from the sweat across his head.

Daniel was very much aware that this attack was going to be a really, really bad one. If nothing else was an indicator, it was how long the attack was taking to actually happen. 

He needed to get out, and fast.

Daniel placed his head in his hand and groaned softly, trying to keep his breathing natural. 

Daniel could hear someone talking to him, but his hearing went fuzzy. “Daniel!” Lula’s voice rang sharp through his hearing. Daniel glanced up and saw the three other horsemen staring back at him. “Why are you all staring at me?” He’d snapped. Lula suddenly sighed loudly. 

Then she stood up quickly.

This was obviously the trigger for the attack.

His breathing stopped.

His vision faded.

His throat closed up.

Daniel pulled himself up from the couch, swaying as he did. His vision was varying between tilting and not even working.

Tears sprung from his eyes, racing down his face uncontrollably.

He pushed past Merritt and Jack, intent on just getting to his room, where it was private.

“Leave him be, Lula. Somethings clearly wrong!” Jack’s sharp command rang through the hall. “No, Jack! He’s in the wrong, but he’s still playing the fucking victim!” Lula had yelled back.

Daniels breathing abruptly cut off, it felt like someone was wrapping their hands around his throat.

Daniel suddenly felt his body fall to the side, luckily hitting a wall. He slid down it and hit the floor.

Daniel could hear someone running towards him, it sounded like Jack, he wasn’t sure. 

He wrapped his arms around his knees and pressed his head forcefully onto his knees. Someone grabbed his hands in their own, they felt calloused.

“Danny? Danny, can you hear me?” Daniel waved a hand on their direction. _Go away I’m fine._ He wanted to say.

His vision blacked out completely. His hearing rang. His breathing stopped.

* * *

**MERRITT.**

Merritt saw Daniel’s pale and flushed face as soon as he’d dragged him out of room and instantly knew something was wrong. At first, he thought it was a case of the flu, or something like that.

But as the small meeting continued, Merritt could see more and more signs that pointed to something else, something mental, rather than physical.

When he’d slapped his thighs in a move to get up, Daniel had violently flinched and stared at the table. Merritt could see the empty, glassy look in his eyes that screamed _PTSD FLASHBACK._

Merritt couldn’t focus on the rest of the meeting, but only on Daniel. His fidgeting grew worse and worse, his face got paler and paler, his body shrunk in on it’s self and his breathing grew steadily irregular.

It all clicked into place when Lula had stood up, yelling. Daniel’s face abruptly turned white, and he’d stumbled off the couch, swaying as he walked down the hall. _Daniel was having a panic attack._

Merritt called his name, determined to help. No one should have to suffer a panic attack alone. Suddenly, Daniel listed to the side and slid down the wall, his panic growing. Jack had yelled his name, but didn’t move. Merritt had dealt with panic attacks before, both calming the person and being the one under attack.

He took one of Daniel’s hands in his own, ready to hypnotise him. Daniel had waved his hand as if to shoo him away.

Merritt didn’t leave.

Then Daniel lifted his head, and _oh god,_ Daniel’s face spoke volumes. His eyes were so full of pain and terror. “I can… I can… can’t… breathe…” he wheezed out, his eyes darting around like an injured animal.

Merritt began to click his fingers on every 4th word as he spoke. “You will listen to my breathing, steady breathing, calm breathing, breathe in, breathe out. Breathing,” This seemed to have no effect. “You can hear my voice, speaking ever so softly into your ears. Listening to my voice, hear my voice, learn my voice,” Daniel’s breathing still didn’t level out. Merritt pushed on his chest, resulting to the last method he could think of. _Forced sleep._

“You can feel your breathing evening out, your eyelids growing heavier and heavier, you can hear my heart beat, beating, beating. Fatigue is the one thing you feel, you know. When I say 3, you will sleep, sleep deeper that you have ever slept before… 1… 2… 3, and sleep."

Daniel abruptly went slack against the wall. 

Merritt waved Jack over. “Come on, let’s get him into his bed,” Merritt could see Lula watching with wide eyes in the living room still. The two helped carry the 25-year-old man to his bed, where they dropped him down. 

Merritt closed the door quietly when he left.

* * *

“Did I cause that?” Lula’s quiet, scared voice spoke up. “No, that was an attack that was brewing for quite some time. I’ve not seen an attack that bad in over 30 years.” Merritt replied, deep in thought. “So what was that then? Anxiety?” Jack asked. “No, that was a severe panic attack.” Merritt said.

“Fucking hell, I never knew he had them this bad… or at all, for that matter.” Jack had whispered. “It was my fault. He went all weird when I stood up.” Lula said. Merritt shook his head, “No, he was weird when I got him this morning.” 

“Why did he panic when I stood up then?” Lula asked. Merritt sighed deeply, “I don’t know. But judging on how he reacted to loud slapping noises and sudden movements, I think he was abused as a young boy. Quite badly, as you can both guess.” Merritt explained. “Jesus man… I mean, my dad knocked me around a few times, but never that badly.” Jack whispered. Merritt sighed again. “Guys, we cannot, under _any_ circumstances, let him know we know how bad these get. He was clearly going to sort himself out in private, you know how reserved he is. If we suddenly start treating him like glass, he’ll clock on and it’ll just make it worse.” Merritt addressed the two youngest horsemen. “Merritt, we can’t just ignore this! He needs mental help!” Jack had whisper-yelled. “And he will, one day. We can’t force him to. Jack, I know how it feels when someone witnesses you having a panic attack. You feel vulnerable and embarrassed. It just makes it worse. Please just treat him like normal.” Lula sniffed loudly. “We will. What do we do about his abusive past?” Merritt bit his lip in thought.

“Just be more careful with your movements… and don’t give him a load of shit when he does something wrong… even if he _is_ a jackass, he’s probably already been treated badly enough for his mistakes.” Merritt finally said.

Jack and Lula nodded. “Ok, let’s get some sleep. Today has been mentally taxing on everyone.” The two formers nodded solemnly and left for their rooms, not saying anything. 

Merritt waited until their doors were shut before he went in and checked on Daniel once again. He was curled up on his side now, facing the door. Merritt could see his chest rising and falling slowly and his skin had began to turn back to its normal pasty white, rather than ash.

Merritt closed the door quietly and left for the kitchen.

If he was going to get any sleep tonight, he’d need to help from some whiskey.


	9. Shitty childhood.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a super quick A/N. Expect more regular updates, but of varying chapter updates. Writing is the only thing pulling me through life rn. In a nut shell, in addition to the shit going on this year already, I’ve just found out that one of my closest friends, who I’ve known for over 5 years, has been murdered… my life isn’t going great at the minute, so yeah. Just bear with me for now.
> 
> TAGS INCLUDED/ADDED: (Suicide attempt! Siblings! Abuse!)

Jack wasn’t even sure how the argument had escalated to where it was now. They were all sitting around, eating shitty Chinese take out in front of trashy TV, having a laugh… when it all kicked off for no reason.

Henley was stood up, face nearly as red as her hair, as she screamed at Daniel for borderline 5 minutes straight now. Daniel had mentioned re-revising the plans for the show, as it was the next night, and Henley had just snapped.

Jack honestly couldn’t blame her though: they’d been working constantly for the last year or so. Everyone was wound up tightly and ready to pop at a moments notice. Jack was just surprised it wasn’t Daniel first. But then again, he felt bad for Daniel. Henley was being quite nasty, even though most of it was undeserved.

“ _WHY_ do you have to be such a _CONTROL FREAK_!?” Henley shrieked, reaching her breaking point. “ _MY PARENTS! THAT’S WHY_!” Daniel had yelled back. The room fell into a thick, tense silence. Henley was taking deep, gasping breaths as she reined in her anger. “What the hell are you on about now?” She’d asked. Jack’s eyes nervously darted between the two as he waited for an answer. Daniel’s face had lost all its colour, and he almost looked hunched in on himself. “Nothing, don’t bother.” He’d snarled and stormed off to his room. Henley grunted loudly in frustration before storming off to her own room, slamming the door loudly. Jack’s mind was running at about 90 miles-an-hour as he tried to catch up with the situation. Merritt turned to him slowly, exhaling deeply. “Jackie-boy, please tell me you are just as confused as I am?” All Jack could do was nod quietly.

* * *

Henley came out of her room about 2 hours later, and Daniel had yet to be seen. Jack presumed he was just staying out of the way. They’d put more trashy tv on, but nobody was really paying attention. Henley was still fuming, clearly. Merritt was probably asleep again and all Jack could think about was Daniel. Sure, he was an asshole, and a controlling jackass, but something happened that he hadn’t meant to. In the 15 months Jack had known him, Daniel had never hunched in on himself… _never._

* * *

“Hey guys, I’m gonna go check on Daniel,” Jack said nearly 3 hours later. It was 2 in the morning now, and everyone was still awake. “Go for it.” Henley had dismissed, her anger forgotten. Merritt didn’t say anything, so Jack presumed he was either asleep, or didn’t care. It was a 50/50 draw really. 

Jack got up from the couch and crept to Daniel’s room. He tried the door, expecting it to be locked, but it wasn’t. Hell, it wasn’t even shut all the way. _Another red flag._

Jack rapped his knuckles against the door anyway. “What?” A slightly thick voice sounded. Angry still, but thick. It sounded like the voice of someone who had been crying or someone who was sick. “It’s me, Jack. Can I come in?” He asked, quietly. The eye roll was almost audible. “Whatever,” Daniel called through. Jack resisted the urge to roll his eyes as he walked in.

Just like he’d expected, Daniel’s room was a neat freak’s dream. No clothes were on the floor, nothing was on the drawers, everything was put away and organised perfectly. Jack closed the door behind him, hearing the slight click as it fitted into the doorframe. Daniel was sat, cross legged on the bed with his laptop in his lap. His right eyebrow was raised. “Do you need anything?” He asked, rudely. Jack sat on the small chair by the desk and inhaled deeply. “What was that?” He managed to get out after 53 seconds of tense silence. Daniel frowned and turned back to his laptop. “I don’t have time to play 15 questions or whatever it is. Ask what you want, then leave. I’m busy.” He snapped. “Ok, then. Why did you flinch when you mentioned your parents?” Jack retorted…and there was the flinch again. It wasn’t noticeable if you weren’t actively searching for it, but it was there. “I don’t know what you mean.” Daniel replied, still not looking at him. “Just because I’m only 20, doesn’t mean I’m stupid.” Jack said, leaning forward slightly. Daniel didn’t bother to reply. 

Jack sighed and stood up. He took the laptop out of Daniel’s lap and shut the lid. “Hey! What the fuck, Jack?! I was using that!” Daniel protested. Jack put the laptop under his chair. “And I was talking to you. Whats your point?” Jack replied. Daniel huffed and glared at him. “You can’t make me answer questions I don’t want to, Jack.” He eventually said. “I never said I was. All I did was ask why you flinched when you mentioned your parents.” Daniel turned to glare at the bed instead. 

The pair sat in silence for a while before Daniel spoke again. “I’m pretty sure what you’re doing is some form of abuse.” Jack quirked an eyebrow. “Is that so?” He replied, bored. Daniel huffed again and looked away. Jack lounged back in the wooden chair and waited. “Daniel, people don’t just flinch when they mention their parents. _I_ know why you flinched.” He spoke after 10 minutes of stony silence. “Then why are you asking me?” Daniel replied. “Because I want _you_ to tell me.” Daniel didn’t say anything.

Jack leant forwards so his lower arms were resting on his legs. “Daniel, I know the signs of the abused.” There goes the flinch again. “You should be careful throwing that term around so loosely. You might come across someone who’s actually been abused.” Daniel replied, slight hesitance creeping into his voice. “Yeah, I should be. And I have. Wanna know why I know?” Jack asked. “Because I was abused as a child. I know the expressions, I know the feelings, I know the body posture, I know the stony expressions. If I haven’t seen them on myself, I saw them on my sisters. You can’t tell me you haven’t been abused by someone at some point, Daniel. That’s just insulting.” Jack had apparently hit a sore spot, because Daniel had inhaled shakily. “Whatever I say to you in here… does not, _does not,_ leave this room. Are we clear?” Daniel said, looking him straight in the eyes. Only now, looking into the gorgeous sapphire colour eyes, did Jack see how much pain and hurt was lurking behind the iris. “Crystal,"

* * *

 **Daniel.  
** It started when he was only 7. His real name wasn’t Daniel. Well it was, but it wasn’t. His birth name is Jason Daniel Adams.

Daniel was the oldest child out of 4. Two years after him was his sister Rosie, then 3 years after her was his twin brother and sister Zack and Kayleigh.

Daniel’s mom was an ok mother. She provided the basics for her kids and that was it. No love or care, or hugs. Just shelter, food, water, clothes and a TV licence. They only had that cause A) his mom wanted it for her shows and B) so they’d leave her alone during the day. Daniel’s dad had died before he was 1, so he didn’t have many memories of him. Rosie’s dad ran away when he found out she was on the way and the twins father unfortunately stuck around. For some reason, he loathed Daniel and Rosie. The feeling was very much returned.

His name was Matthew. If Daniel or Rosie had their show on while the twins were playing, Matthew would storm in and “accidentally” kick them as he walked by to put the twins own show on. Daniel’s mom was a bit of a slapper, so she wasn’t at home much, leaving Matthew to watch all 4 kids most evenings. 

Sure, he watched Zack and Kayleigh was overwhelming love and care, but he couldn’t give 2 shits about Daniel or Rosie. They grew up fending for themselves.

Daniel was only 9 when the physical abuse started. It started quick. Daniel came home from school once with Rosie in tears. Someone had called her fatty-four-eyes and Daniel had punched them in the face. He’d gotten sent home early, and Rosie snuck out with him. Matthew wasn’t home, so they took the opportunity to sneak some food in and get a shower before he came back. Rosie went first to grab a shower, while Daniel grabbed a handful of snacks. He snuck them upstairs and hid them in Rosie’s period draw. If Matthew found them, then he’s a perv. Rosie came out of the shower and went into her room to dry quickly. Daniel went in next. 

He came out about 10 minutes later and snuck into his room to dry and get dressed. He walked out and straight into a broad chest. Daniel had stumbled back in shock and tripped over a rift in the rug, landing on his ass. “Pathetic,” Matthew had sneered. “Get up,” Daniel bit down his fear and stood up. “Out,” He’d commanded. Daniel scurried out and waited outside his room, knowing if he left, he’d be in for it. Matthew suddenly threw the door open with an angry roar. “WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?!” He’d yelled, throwing something hard at Daniel. He just about caught it and saw it was a mug Kayleigh had made and given him. “Kayleigh made it for me!” He squeaked out. Matthew snarled. “Don’t lie to me, you little shit!” He lunged at Daniel, and pushed him down the stairs.

Daniel tumbled all the way to the bottom, groaning in pain. Matthew walked by, standing on his hand with all his weight. Daniel screamed out in pain. Matthew twisted his foot, breaking the bones in Daniel’s hand even more. “Shut up you pussy!” Daniel bit down his screams as he tried to stay awake. “That’ll teach you for lying.” He stared disgusted at Daniel. “Go and clean up before your mom and Kayleigh get home."

* * *

It went on like that for nearly 5 years before Daniel left. Normally Matthew would only pick on him, but he sometimes took it out on Rosie if Daniel was too battered to take another beating.

Daniel was 14 when _it_ happened.

Rosie had to stay home one day to watch Kayleigh as Matthew was at work, his mom was at her stripper club and Matthew didn’t trust Daniel enough to watch her.

Daniel had stayed later that day to catch up on some school work he’d missed over the last few weeks (thanks to his concussion and broken ribs) and was home an hour later than normal. Matthew hadn’t said anything, obviously pleased he’d had an extra hour free from Daniel. 

Daniel had walked upstairs ready to have a shower. He’d called out for Rosie a few times, but presumed she was taking a nap or something. 

But when he walked into the bathroom, his questions were answered.

“Rosie! ROSIE!” Daniel screamed, running to her. She had slit her wrists in 3 long angry red lines on each wrist in the bathtub, and judging from the stains on her wrists, it’d been a while ago. Daniel pressed fingers to her neck, desperately trying to find a pulse. “Rose, wake up! Please wake up! Please be a sick prank!” 

But she didn’t move from the tub. Or ever again.

* * *

His mom had cried a little, but most people do when someone they know is dead. All the scumbag Matthew did was say about how there was now one less mouth to feed, and they just needed to bump Daniel off. 

Daniel had punched him right on his nose and had snarled, “Have some respect for my dead sister, you absolute asshole.” Matthew had quickly turned red, but didn’t hit him. 

Daniel packed his bags that night and left, never once looking back.

* * *

* * *

**JACK.  
**

“Happy now? You know the mystery of J.Daniel Atlas,” Daniel had sneered. Jack hadn’t realised how frozen he was until Daniel had pushed his legs apart to grab his laptop from under Jack’s chair. “Anything else you want to know about my tragic childhood? Perhaps how many times I ended up debating suicide? Or how many times I suffered from a concussion so bad, I nearly had memory loss? Or maybe even how I tried to overdose on pills after Rosie had died, but I took vitamins for kids instead and just suffered in silence for three days after? Or maybe, _maybe,_ how that jackass got away with everything?” Jack just listened quietly, not sure how to react. 

Daniel inhaled and exhaled shakily a few times, playing with some blue tack between his index finger and middle finger. Jack recognised the motion from stimming. He thinks its what people use to ward of panic and anxiety attacks.

“I’m sorry if I made you upset man. I just wanted to see what was wrong in case I could help,” Jack eventually forced out of his body. Daniel had glanced at him from the corner of his eyes. “It’s fine I guess. At least I don’t have to hide it from you anymore.” 

The two settled into a silence. Jack couldn’t work out if it was a comfortable silence, or an awkward one.

Taking the silence as his leave, Jack did so. “Wait!” Daniel said before Jack could open the door. “Please don’t tell the others.” Daniel borderline begged. Jack’s eyes widened. Daniel _never_ begged. “Dude, I don’t think I can keep this from the others.” Jack replied, feeling guilty. “Jack, please! This is my secret, not theirs! Don’t do this!” Jack could _see_ the fear in Daniel’s sapphire coloured eyes. He caved.

“Fine, but you _have_ to tell them at some point.” He conceded. Daniel’s relief was almost contagious. “Thank you,"

Jack left Daniel’s room and shut it again. He walked back into the front room, feeling kind of numb.

“Well?” Henley asked. Jack shook his head slightly. “Well what?” He replied. “You said you were gonna go check on him like an hour ago. I’m guessing something happened?” Henley said in return. Jack almost spilled the beans, but then he remembered Daniel’s eyes. The _fear_ in his eyes. 

In the end, Jack shook his head. “Nothing happened, Hen. I talked him down from having a meltdown like a 5 year old. Nothing unusual there,” Henley rolled her eyes. “You aren’t telling me something, and I don’t know what or why… but there’s a reason, so I won’t push. Just tell him to leave me alone tomorrow,"

Then she left.

Jack let himself fall back into the sofa with a tired sigh. _Daniel was trusting him with this huge secret about his past. The least Jack could do was keep his promise and not say anything._


	10. Appendicitis.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TAGS INCLUDED/ADDED: (Vomiting! Cramps! Pain! Sleeping! Swearing!)
> 
> I’M SORRY, I’VE GOT A LOT OF BAD SHIT GOING ON AT THE MINUTE, SO THIS ISN’T THAT LONG. IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT, GO BACK TO CHAPTER 8, AND YOU’LL UNDERSTAND.

Daniel knew something was wrong when he woke up, he just couldn't place what. He’d been feeling a bit shit all week, a small headache, a dull ache everywhere and a bit nauseous. He’d just presumed he was coming down with a cold.

He’d woken up that morning with a dull, but painful, ache all across his stomach. Daniel felt a little cold, which meant he must have a small fever. 

His alarm had woken him up at 7:00 every morning like usual. Normally, Daniel would get some breakfast (a nutra-grain bar or some shit like that) so he could take his pills, which were antidepressants, Anxiety reducers, OCD meds and some for his ADHD. Then he would go for a shower, come out, get dry, check his emails and relax for a bit before the others woke up.

But that morning, it was all Daniel could do to roll over and unplug the damn thing. His stomach hurt, he was exhausted, his head hurt and he felt like shit. Daniel managed to roll back over and get some more sleep before Henley walked in.

Henley was normally the second one up, normally before Merritt and Jack. She’d do her morning routine, eat her breakfast and come in to sit with Daniel for a bit while they waited for the others. She’d come in like usual, her hair slightly damp. “Whoa, where’s Daniel Atlas at? He’s never in bed at…” she checks her phone time, “9 am still. Not unless he’s ill or hurt!” She’d dramatically exclaimed, falling onto the bed like an actress. She’d landed on his legs and woke him up. “What do you _want_ Henley? I’m exhausted,” Daniel wined, pushing up so he was propped up on his pillows. His stomach protested slightly and grumbled, but didn’t do anything else. “Did you pull another all-nighter?” She’d asked, chewing her fingernail as she stared at the ceiling. Daniel slid back down into the warm duvet and sighed, feeling the chill in his bones leaving. “No… I think the neighbours were either fighting or having sex again. I don’t know,” _Lie. He’d been up all night with a contact dull ache. It wasn’t painful enough to hurt hurt, but enough to keep him awake._

“That sucks. _I_ slept _wonderfully!_ “ Henley said in a sing-song voice. Daniel rolled his eyes and turned onto his left side so he could use his phone that was still plugged in. He had a few emails from spam pages and fan accounts, but nothing worth while. He turned it off and dropped it on his bedside table again. “Henley, get _off!”_ Daniel grunted as he pulled his legs out from under her body. Henley giggled and rolled so she was sitting cross legged on his bed. “You can’t stay in bed forever ya know.” Henley had said, playing with the fleece comforter his sister had sent him for his birthday from Finland. “I won’t. I’m coming out in a bit, I just need to get ready.” The answer seemed to satisfy Henley, because she stood up and sighed dramatically. “I guess I’ll have to annoy Jack then."

* * *

Daniel honestly hadn’t meant to fall asleep again, but he did.

He was kind of semi-woken up when people were whispering in his room. It sounded like Merritt was telling Henley to let him sleep in for a bit, cus god knows he don’t look after himself properly.

The whispering left, but the pain didn’t.

* * *

**Henley.**

When Daniel finally stumbled out of his room at about midday, Henley could see why. In his dark-ish room, you can’t really see well. But in the florescent lighting of the kitchen, Henley saw how _awful_ he looked. His hair wasn’t as full of life as it normally was, his eyes were’t as bright, he was slumped over and shivering slightly. Daniel had an old, baggy t-shirt on and some loose fitting PJ bottoms on. The fact that his hair wasn’t styled and fluffy spoke volumes about how shit he must feel. She stopped herself from saying anything, but watched silently. Merritt was dozing on the couch (she thinks, she could never really be sure) and Jack was in the shower. Daniel shuffled into the kitchen and let the door close behind him.

Henley got up and followed him in. She stood quietly by the door and watched. She’d made enough noise so Daniel could hear, but not enough to startle him when he saw her. 

Eventually, Henley gently said: “Would you like some tea?” Daniel stopped rummaging through his med box and looked into her eyes. “God, yes please.” Henley filled the kettle up and watched as it boiled. “Daniel, do you need help with your pills or something?” She asked.

Henley was one of the only few people in his life that knew about his pills. That was mainly because she’d gone out to get them once or twice when he was sick or because she’d found out herself anyway.

“No, I’m just looking,” Daniels voice replied, sounding distracted. “For what?” Henley asked, pouring the boiled water into two cups. In hers, she’d put a green teabag in, and in Daniel’s she’d put a breakfast teabag in. There was no answer, so she turned around to look at him. 

“Do we have any anti-nausea tablets? I’m feeling a bit shit.” Henley nodded. “Yeah, in that box I think. Normally I’d get it, but I don’t know where the stool is.” Daniel reached up on his tip-toes and grabbed the box down. “Sometimes it pays to be 4 inches taller than you,” Daniel said, smirking at her cheekily. Henley swatted at his shoulder and snatched the box out of his hands. She got out 2 anti-nausea tablets and handed them to him with a glass of water. “Have you taken your other pills either?” She asked. Daniel shook his head, covering his mouth with his hand as he yawned. “No... I figured as I’m gonna be sleeping or not doing much I’d give them a miss today. I don’t feel awake enough to be worrying about anything else except when can I go back to bed,” He replied, wrapping his dressing gown tighter around himself. Henley bit back a remark of how shit he looked in favour of drinking her tea as she watched him.

* * *

**Daniel.**

Daniel managed to get a few more hours of uninterrupted sleep before he was roughly woken up again. His stomach was cramping worse than it had done before, and the anti-nausea tablets had clearly worn off while he was sleeping. Daniel slowly rolled over onto his side to check the time and was surprised to see it read 1pm. He’d slept nearly 3 hours. He groaned softly and pushed himself so his legs were off the bed and touching the ground. Daniel’s world warped and spun violently. He put his head in his hands, trying to stop himself from passing out. 

His vision slowly spun back to normal, but it left him feeling exhausted, dizzy and nauseous...

Daniel slowly stood up, blinding reaching out for something to grab onto. He blindly stumbled towards the bathroom, forgetting to close or lock the door before. 

His stomach contracted violently and left him folding halfway at the waist, throwing up into the toilet. His head and stomach protested painfully, but he couldn’t stop vomiting.

He fell to his knees, hugging the toilet as all the dinner from the last 3 days came out. Tears streamed down his face as his stomach throbbed painfully. He coughed and grabbed some toilet paper to wipe his mouth. “Danny?” Someone asked from behind him. It sounded like Henley, but Danny wasn’t sure. Someone pressed a hand to his head, while someone else held his hand.

His stomach contracted again. It took all his strength to just about move his head so his dribble fell into the toilet. His head pounded and his ears fuzzed. All he could hear was bits and pieces of the conversation between the two people in the bathroom with him.

“-11?” That sounded like Henley. The voice was higher and more feminine than the other one. “-worst idea…” there was a slight pause. “-ack to."

Then his world went white with pain and he passed out.

* * *

Daniel woke up in a completely different room. In completely different clothes.

He slowly sat up, very confused. His stomach throbbed painfully and he suddenly panicked. The pain he felt earlier rushed back in a very unpleasant memory.

“Whoa, steady, there, Mr. Adams. You don’t wanna rip your stitches.” Someone spoke to his left, gently pushing down on his shoulder. “Stitches?” Daniel asked. His tongue felt heavy and numb. “Yeah, stitches. Your appendix was about to burst. We had to do an emergency removal. It nearly didn’t go well, but luckily your friends rushed you here quickly. You ended up having a straight line stitch, rather than a keyhole stitch. We didn’t have the time to to a keyhole stitch.” 

Literally none of that made any sense to Daniel’s drug influenced brain. He nodded nonetheless. “Your stitches will stay in for 3 months, so try not to rip them. In 3 months time, we’ll have you back in and re-evaluate the situation. Regardless of timing, you will eventually have the stitches taken out and replaced with dissolvable stitches.” 

Most of it made sense, but an huge wave of exhaustion crashed over him and his eyes began to slide shut. “Ok, get some rest Mr. Adams. I’ll send your friends in later on.” 

Daniel wanted to say thank you, but the newer dose of morphine rushed through his blood and made him sleep.

Daniel slept properly for the first time in over 3 days.


	11. Lack of care.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TAGS INCLUDED/ADDED: (Eating Disorder! Arguments! Crying!)
> 
> Won’t be long.

In the last year, a lot had happened. Jack had moved into the apartment on Evans street permanently, Merritt moved to Chicago for a while, Daniel moved to Vegas to do some more shows and Henley moved to L.A. Henley quite frequently did small shows, and some large ones, while she stayed in L.A. Originally, she was born in L.A, so it was nice to get back to her home roots.

While Henley enjoyed the slowed down life for the first few months, she missed having the boys with her. Merritt’s constant sarcastic jokes, Jack’s childish, innocent humour and she even missed Daniel’s need for control. But after the 3rd month had passed, Henley found herself longing for a sense of chaos again. Running from the FBI for a year did that to you. So, she did something about it.

Henley arranged for Merritt, Jack and Daniel to have a meet up in L.A for a month. When Henley broached the idea, all of them seemed excited. Jack was through the roof, more than happy that he could leave his “shitty, deadbeat job in the local corner shop” and Merritt was more than willing to: He’d gotten a call-centre job, which was apparently really boring. Merritt and Jack could get flights on the same day, but would arrive at vastly different times. Jack was scheduled to leave at 11 am, and is scheduled to land at 5pm, and he’d probably be at hers by 7. Merritt was scheduled to leave at 8 am, and is scheduled to land at land at 12:30pm, and would probably be at hers by 2ish. Daniel had shows booked for the first week of their visit, so he wouldn’t be able to come out until the following week.

* * *

Merritt and Jack had arrived safely and had settled nicely. They’d done the Santa Monica pier and chilled out at Santa Monica beach, but they mainly stayed at Henley's house. Henley had a small pool built into her garden, so they mostly hung out there. Henley had rung Daniel at least 4 times a week in the lead up to the visit. She’d tried asking him normal questions, but all he ever did was boast about a new chick he’d slept with or how well his show went.

* * *

Merritt had called Henley through to her living room, sounding worried. “It’s not another snake is it? If it is, stay calm and leave the room. Make sure you shut the door again!” She called as she wondered through. You’d be surprised to know how many snakes Henley had seen in her house in the last 4 months. “No, it’s not a snake! It’s Daniel’s show on TV!” Henley raised an eyebrow as she pushed through to the front room. She made her way through and sat down on her leather sofa and watched the tv. Henley suddenly knew why Merritt sounded worried.

Even from the TV, 270 miles away, Henley could see how _sick_ he looked. Not like he had a cold sick, but “I’ve not taken care of myself” sick. 

Henley could see how thin he looked, and how lifeless his hair was. “God, he looks so _ill_ , Merritt.” Henley couldn’t help but think how much he’d forgotten to look after himself. Merritt nodded. “I know… he’s due to land tomorrow, isn’t he?” Henley nodded, biting her fingernail.

* * *

Daniel landed at about 11 am, and Henley made sure she picked him up. When she hugged him, she could feel all of his bones. “Danny, have you been eating?” She asked, poking his ribs. Daniel flinched back and pulled his coat tighter around his body. “Yes, Henley. Can we go now? I’m cold,” 

Henley didn’t say that it was 25 degrees. (77 farenheight)

* * *

When they were in the car, neither of them said anything. Henley was concerned over the lack of words pouring from Daniels mouth. Daniel looked like he was desperately trying not to puke, so Henley didn’t say anything. Only once they’d pulled into her drive, did Henley speak. “Daniel, are you ok?” Henley asked, not looking at him. “I’m _fine,_ Henley. I had flu last week. I’m still getting over it."

Judging by his weight, he did _not_ have flu last week. Daniel clearly hadn’t been eating anything for a little while. His face suddenly blanched, and he hurried out of the car and into the house. 

Henley sighed deeply and rubbed her eyes. She got out of the car and grabbed Daniel’s bags before making sure it was locked and going into the house.

* * *

Daniel never actually surfaced from the guest room for the rest of the evening. Henley had told herself that he was sleeping from the time difference, but a nagging feeling inside told her he wasn’t. After Jack and Merritt had retired to the other guest room, Henley walked into Daniel’s room. 

She frowned when she saw it was empty, and undisturbed. That means he’d never been in. Suddenly, a loud retching sounded through the empty hallway. Henley grimaced and weighed up her options. 

_On one hand, she absolutely loathed germs. There was a reason she wore gloves all the time. On the other hand, Daniel was her friend, and he clearly needed help._

Henley sighed deeply and prepared herself for the worst. She gently knocked on the door. Nothing happened, so she pushed the door open. Henley couldn’t help the fury that coursed through her veins. “What the fuck are you doing?!” Henley yelled. 

When she’d walked in, Daniel was bent over the toilet, with two fingers rammed down his throat. Daniel had then gagged painfully, sending a stream of bile into the toilet before looking up at Henley. “Fuck off, Henley… I don’t want to talk about it.” Henley’s eyes had widened. “ _I_ do!” She yelled. 

At this point, Daniel had stood up, facing her. His face was white, and he shook like a leaf. “It’s none of your business!” Daniel yelled back. “What are ya’ll yelling for? It’s 2 in the goddam morning!” Merritt asked as he trudged in, Jack following quickly behind. “Daniel’s been purging!” Henley answered the unspoken question. “Whats purging?” Jack asked. Merritt turned to him and whispered in his ear. Jack’s eyes widened before he addressed Daniel. “Dude, _why_ would you do that? Isn’t that like… bad for you?” Daniel shuddered before storming out of the bathroom. They all followed him. He abruptly stopped in his tracks and shivered. “Daniel, I didn’t mean to get so angry, but why are you doing this?” Henley asked, reaching out for his shoulder. 

Daniel whipped around, tears rolling down his face. “ _I said,_ I don’t want to talk about it. Just leave me alone.” Henley grabbed his (too) boney wrist before she looked him in the eyes. “Daniel, we can help you, just tell us why!” Daniel snatched his wrist away and shut his bedroom door.

* * *

Henley didn’t sleep that night. She was too concerned for Daniel’s physical and mental wellbeing. She snuck in during the night to make sure Daniel wasn’t purging again. Instead, he was shivering underneath several layers of blankets. Henley had gently shook him awake. Daniel inhaled sharply, before realising who it was. “Henley, I’m really not in the mood for your questions right now.” He said, before turning on his side. “I came in because you were shivering. I wanted to know if you wanted anything? Any blankets or extra radiators?” She asked. “No,” Daniel replied, not looking at her. Henley nodded, and slowly left the room. Just before she shut the door, Daniel spoke again. “A heating pad? Do you have one?” His voice sounded so broken and fragile. 

Henley smiled sadly, but knew he couldn’t see her. “Sure, no problem…"


	12. 11) Tourettes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TAGS INCLUDED/ADDED: (Crying! Yelling! Arguments! Hitting! Swearing!)
> 
> Disclaimer: I know nothing about Tourettes. I’m going purely off of a video I watched and information on the internet. I’m sorry if I offend anyone, it’s not my intention.

Daniel was in the hospital again. His Tourettes had landed him here. He’d had them since he was quite young, but he took some pills and they seemed to calm down.

He was already taking a shit-tone of pills every morning: OCD reducers, Anxiety pills, Antidepressants, ADHD calming pills, and then he was having to take his Tourettes reducers… _AND_ he had to hide it from the others. They couldn’t see him taking 5 pills every morning, they’d ask questions.

It didn’t help that when he had a migraine or something, he couldn’t take any pain reliever. His body was only just coping with all the other meds surging through his blood, it’d completely give up the ghost if it had to deal with codeine as well. So, he’d stick noise cancelling earphones on, take a sleeping pill and try to sleep it off. Don’t even get him started when he has the flu.

Anyway, he had Tourettes. It first started when he was young, and it was swearing and jerky movements. His parents though he had it, but it wasn’t severe enough to be classed as anything bad. His constant foul language always got him into trouble at school and ostracised him from any possible friends. 

His teachers never believed him when he said what he had, so he was always in detention. Daniel never actually said _bad_ bad words, but he did drop the occasional “fuck” or “bastard” bomb.

He was nearly 18 when he was properly diagnosed. It was only because he had a tic attack in his senior year and his teacher thought he was having a seizure and admitted him to the local hospital, where they officially diagnosed him.

Daniel hated it. He hated being stared at like a freak, and he hated having no control over his body. Magic was literally his escape. His tics weren’t nearly as bad when he was focusing on his magic. It allowed him to fall into the cards, and just forget how shit his life really was.

Daniel thinks thats why people think he’s an asshole. He has no control over his own body, so he controls everything around it. It’s literally the only way he can stop his tics. 

Daniel’s last severe tic attack was when he was 20 years old, and he was now 24. He’d gone nearly a half-a-decade without a tic attack, and he was hoping to keep it that way. But life doesn’t always work out the way you want it to.

* * *

_They were on the plane back from New Orleans to New York, ready for their final show. Daniel had just escaped from Dray, and was desperately trying to ward off an anxiety attack. It didn’t help that he’d dropped his cards on the way back, and consequently had nothing to keep his mind busy. So while Jack went to the shitty economy class bathroom, Daniel borrowed his cards to fiddle with._

_They didn’t feel the same as his own ones, but they were doing the job. He could feel his anxiety slowly ebbing away._

_It also didn’t help that in the last year, Daniel hadn’t been able to buy some more pills for his body. That meant his anxiety was through the roof, his Tourettes were back, his need for control was almost killing him, he went through phases of debating on killing himself, and to top it all off, he was bouncing in his seat, thanks to his ADHD._

_So yeah, his body was super fucked up. Jack came back from the bathroom and didn’t seem to notice his cards were missing, so Daniel continued to shuffle them, quietly._

_~~~~~_

_The attack happened about 2 days later, in their crummy, aids riddled apartment on Evans Street._

_Daniel was in the kitchen, literally just buttering some toast. He could feel a tic coming. “Fuck!” He spat, desperately trying to be quiet. The voices in the other room quietened for a second before continuing again. His brain felt somewhat fuzzier than usual, which either meant an anxiety attack or a tic attack._

_Then for no reason at all, he grabbed the butter and squeezed it, squirting it all down his front and all on the floor. “Shit,” He cursed, putting his toast on the plate and getting a paper towel to clear it up. His tics had obviously decided to play a game with him, because he suddenly had the burning desire to smack his head on the linoleum floor. Daniel obviously resisted it, but it actually hurt to stop it._

_The paper towel was dropped in the bin (not before he’d kicked it, muttering “trashy bin”) as he walked through to the living area._

_Daniel bit into his toast, then had the overwhelming urge to_ **bite, bite, bite,** _on his tongue. Instead, he bit his cheek. He’d bitten it hard enough to draw blood._

_If these last few tics weren’t a big enough giveaway, nothing was. A large tic attack was on the way._

_When they’d moved into the apartment, Daniel had essentially baby proofed his roof. There was nothing sharp or dangerous to himself, not even any belts. Just clothes and pillows. So all he could do was punch pillows and himself._

_Daniel went to move into his bedroom, when his neck snapped sharply to the right, determined to keep turning. “What the fuck, dude! Don’t do that!” Jack had yelled, covering his mouth in a shocked expression. Daniel forced himself to pull it back, even though his whole body was screaming_ **_bend bend bend._ **

_Daniel started to painfully play with his middle finger, the stimulation bring him back to reality (slightly)_

_Suddenly, a shiver ran through his body. It was enough for his tics to apparently start playing up again, because his hand suddenly punched his leg._

* * *

* * *

**Henley.**

_“Daniel! Stop!” She yelled, grabbing her friends hands, stopping him from punching himself. His whole body shuddered again, before he raised his right leg and forcefully kicked the sofa._

_Henley heard the crack of his heel. “Merritt! Help me!” She’d cried, grabbing his legs, stopping him from hitting himself anymore. Daniel’s free hand grabbed her hair and yanked it upwards, causing tears to spring to her eyes. “Ow! STOP!” He let her hair go and went back to punching himself._

_“Henley, does he have_ _Tourettes?” Merritt asked, puling her out of her stare. “I don’t know, but what is he doing! Daniel FUCKING STOP!” Henley shrieked as he grabbed his plate of toast and quickly brought it down on his knee, smashing it._

_His knee began bleeding profusely._

_“Jack, call 911! Now!” Henley shouted. Jack ran to the phone and dialled them. “Tourettes or no, he shouldn’t be doing this! Merritt, grab his hands!” Henley demanded. Merritt grabbed Daniels right arm, and pushed enough weight into it to stop it moving, but not enough to break it. Before Henley could grab the other one, Daniel’s body sharply twisted to the left.  
_

_The breaking of bone was very much audible. Henley gagged, and looked away from the damaged limb. “JACK! HOW FAR AWAY ARE THE PARAMEDICS?!” She yelled. “5 minutes, they reckon!”  
_

_Daniel’s harsh yell suddenly brought all their attention to him. His left hand was poking the shard of porcelain in his leg, making the wound spurt more blood.  
_

_“Merritt, **DICK** , hypnotise me into sleeping, **ASSHOLE**! I can’t hurt myself anymore, **C**T!** "_

_Henley’s grandmother would be turning in her grave right now. Merritt did as Daniel asked, and hypnotised him into falling asleep._

* * *

**Daniel.**

Daniel vividly remembered it all. His knee had been reconstructed and stitched up, his ankle was strapped up and his pain meds made him feel _awesome._

He suddenly felt crushing guilt for talking to Merritt that way. He sunk into his pillows with a quiet groan. “Daniel?” Someone muttered. _Shit, he didn’t know anyone was in here..._

It was only Jack. “Henley and Merritt have gone to get a drink,” Jack offered as an explanation to Daniels apparently confused face. “Did I say anything really offensive?” He asked, dreading the answer. “Nah, not really. You said fuck a few times… and dick… and bastard. You only said one super bad word, the _Tuesday_ word, but that was it.” Daniel growled and punched his non-injured knee. “Stupid,” he muttered. “Dude, you’re not doing that again!” Jack stood up quickly. “I’m not, Jack. Don’t worry… I’m just frustrated."

The two fell into a silence again. “Why didn’t you tell any of us that you had Tourettes, man? We could have helped you…” Daniel chuckled darkly, and turned to look out of the window. “Jack, there’s a lot you don’t know about me…"

“Like?” Jack prompted. “What do you mean, like?” Daniel snapped. “Like what? I won’t judge,” Jack promised. “Ok then… my fucked up life includes: ADHD, OCD, depression, anxiety and Tourettes. Anything else?” Daniel snarked. “Dude, why didn’t you say anything?” Jack whispered. 

Daniel looked away. He had no answer. His parents and peers had always told him that normal was the only way, and Daniel was _not_ normal.

“I don’t know, Jack. I guess I’m ashamed?” Daniel eventually said. “Dude, we all have our quirks. Henley’s a germaphobe, Merritt had depression and I have really fucking bad ADHD, man. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, honestly. You don’t see us judging each other.” Daniel didn’t say anything. Jack scooted over on the shitty metal chair. The sound irritated Daniel’s ears. 

Jack nudged his leg with his elbow. “But, and I’m aware on how cliché this sounds… we’re family, dude. Whether you like it or not, we look after each other."

This, mumble jumble, crazy group of people were family. Daniel was the control freak brother, Henley was the mother, Jack was the little brother, and Merritt was the crazy, fun uncle.

Daniel smiled to himself as he looked away.

This family was better than the one he was born into, and it just goes to show that family isn’t always blood.

**Author's Note:**

> Family isn’t always blood.  
> It’s with whom you love ~ Lou La. (Me!)


End file.
